Make Room for Happiness
Kathy Gates


Close your eyes and visualize this.  (Ok, bad idea. . . since you can't read with your eyes closed).  So instead, just clear your thoughts for a minute and get this picture in your head.

I've been painting my den.  All the furniture is crowded together in the middle of the room.  I expertly (yeah, right) organized the space where we could get to the couch to watch TV . . . except, of course, for anything we need, which always seems to be clear across the room.  It's jumbled, and crowded, and out-of-sync.  Nothing's easy, nothing’s within reach, and I spend way more time doing simple things than I normally would.

Sound familiar?  (I see hands going up out there. . . I knew it!).  That's a very accurate description of everyday life for many people.  A crowded up, jumbled up, not-in-sync quadrant of time and space.

Not a pretty picture.  Now imagine that you wanted to ADD something to that space.  Maybe you really really wanted a new couch, or new TV, or even just a new rug.  It would only crowd things that much more.  It would only make you more uncomfortable, and out of sync.

As a Life Coach, people come to me every day wanting to ADD something to their lives. . .  starting a new business, finding a relationship, writing a book.  But their lives are like my den. . . crowded and “unfunctionable."  Adding something would only make them more uncomfortable than they already are.

If you want something new and different in your life, you must first make ROOM.  Make room for happiness by moving OUT the old.

Where do you start to begin to make room for happiness?

1.  Time.  How do you spend your time?  Is it wasted time, or refreshing time?  Does it take you toward your goals, or away from them?  Are you consciously spending time, or just letting it happen?

2.  Environment.  What no longer is working for you in your environment?  Are there unfinished projects that were important at one time, but no longer intrigue you?  When you look around, does your environment make you feel good?  Make you smile?

3.  Relationships.   What relationships are no longer effective to your happiness?  Do the people in your life support you?  Are you are proud to introduce them to others?  Do you learn from them?

4.  Thinking.  Do you talk to yourself like your best friend?  Or do you talk to yourself like the neighbor  you despise?  Do your thoughts inspire and motivate you…or hold you back from your best self?

5.  Work.  Do you feel fulfilled and happy about your work, whether that’s a domestic engineer, or CEO?  Or do you dread doing the work, and just count  the minutes until time off?

Once you have made the room for success, adding what you really want WILL give you pleasure and fulfillment.  If you try to add it on top of what you already have, it will become just another source of aggravation.  First, you must set up your life to support success.

Just as in my den, as I begin to rearrange the sofa and chairs, the rest of the room became easier and easier.  So it will be with your life…as you change one part, each will be easier and easier.

Kathy Gates, Professional Life Coach, can help you restructure your life so that it’s easier, more fun, and a more genuine expression of who you are.

More on happiness.


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Yes, life can be mysterious and confusing--but there's much of life that's actually rather dependable and reliable.  Some principles apply to life in so many different contexts that they can truly be called universal--and learning what they are and how to approach them and use them can teach us some of the most important lessons that we've ever learned.
My doctorate is in Teaching and Learning.  I use it a lot when I teach at school, but I also do my best to apply what I've learned to the life I'm living, and to observe how others live their lives.  What makes them happy or unhappy, stressed or peaceful, selfish or generous, compassionate or arrogant?  In this book, I've done my best to pass on to you what I've learned from people in my life, writers whose works I've read, and stories that I've heard.  Perhaps these principles can be a positive part of your life, too!
Universal Principles of Living Life Fully.  Awareness of these principles can explain a lot and take much of the frustration out of the lives we lead.


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