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The key
element in encouragement is to stop being judgmental.
The important thing isn't the grade your son got; it's the
effort he put out. It isn't whether your daughter hit a
home run; it's that she went up to the plate and took a
swing. The effort is what matters, because as long as we
are trying we are fulfilling our mission. "Examine
me, O Lord, and try me," the Psalmist wrote. . . .
Our
children are better than they think. What kind of mirror
do we hold up to them? Do we point out all their faults
and problems, or do we point out their beauty and
successes? What do you say to your kids when they walk
out the door? Stand up straight? Fix your
pants? Did you forget your lunch or your books? Do
you ever say, "You're a beautiful person. God and I are
proud of you."
A
friend tells me he tries to encourage his children, but his
fourteen-year-old daughter doesn't believe him when he tells
her how wonderful she is. Two-year-olds don't doubt you
when you hold out your hands and tell them they can walk, but
it can be trickier encouraging older children or spouses or
adult friends. Giving encouragement, like other forms of
loving, sometimes requires creativity. . . .
Here is
a prescription for encouraging the people you love: Say
good things about them to their faces and behind their
backs. And don't worry about exaggerating. An
overdose of love has no recorded adverse side effects.
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Prescriptions for Living.
Bernie S.
Siegel
A nice look at life from a formerly anal-retentive
doctor who shaved his head, changed his name from "Dr. Siegel" to Bernie,
and actually started caring for his patients. He learned more from the change
than they did. |
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