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More
from and about
Nathaniel Branden
(biographical info at bottom of page) |
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Romantic
love is a passionate spiritual-emotional-sexual
attachment
between two people that reflects a high regard
for the value of each other's person. |
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Stressing the practice of living purposefully as
essential to fully realized
self-esteem is not equivalent to measuring
an individual’s worth by his
or her external achievements.
We admire achievements—in ourselves
and others— and it is
natural and appropriate for us to do so.
But that is
not the same thing as saying that our achievements
are the measure
or grounds of our self-esteem.
The root of our self-esteem is not
our achievements but those
internally generated practices that,
among other things, make it
possible for us to achieve.
How do we keep
our inner fire alive? Two things, at minimum, are needed: an
ability to appreciate the positives in our life – and a
commitment to action. Every day, it's important to ask and answer
these questions: ‘What's good in my life?’ and ‘What needs
to be done?
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Faith is the commitment of
one's consciousness to
beliefs for which one has no sensory evidence or
rational proof. When a person rejects reason as his
or her standard of judgment, only one alternative standard remains to that
person: his or her feelings. A mystic
is one who treats his or her feelings as tools of cognition. Faith is the
equation of feelings with knowledge.
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The natural
inclination of a child is to take pleasure in the use of
the mind no less than of the body. The child's primary
business is
learning. It is also the primary entertainment. To retain
that
orientation into adulthood, so that consciousness is not a
burden
but a joy, is the mark of the successfully developed human
being.
Of all
the judgments we pass in life, none is more important than
the judgment we pass on ourselves.
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To
love is to see myself in you and to wish to celebrate myself with
you. What I love is the embodiment of my values in another person.
Love
is an
act of self-assertion, self-expression and a celebration of being
alive.
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There is overwhelming evidence that the higher
the level of self-esteem,
the more likely one will be to treat others with respect,
kindness, and generosity. |
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Live
with integrity, respect the rights of other people, and follow
your own bliss. |
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Persons
of high self-esteem are not driven to make themselves
superior to others; they do not seek to prove their value by
measuring themselves against a comparative standard. Their
joy is being who they are, not in being better than someone else. |
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In
any culture, subculture, or family in which belief is valued above
thought, and self-surrender is valued above self-expression, and
conformity is valued above integrity, those who preserve their
self-esteem are likely to be heroic exceptions. |
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Psychotherapist
and philosopher Nathaniel Branden, Ph.D. is a lecturer, practicing
psychotherapist, and author of twenty books on the psychology of
self-esteem, romantic love, and the life and thought of Objectivist
philosopher Ayn Rand. His work has been translated into 18
languages and has sold over 4 million copies, and includes such
titles as Taking Responsibility, The Six Pillars of
Self Esteem, and My Years with Ayn Rand.
The
name Nathaniel Branden has become synonymous with the psychology of
self-esteem, a field he began pioneering over thirty years
ago. In that time, he has done more than any other theorist to
advocate the importance of self-esteem to human well-being, a
mission which began with his involvement in Objectivist philosopher
Ayn Rand's "Inner Circle."
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