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day, and thank you much for dropping by. Your
presence here means
much more to us than we can express, and we truly
hope that your visit to
this page is not wasted--that there's something here
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Grown
people may learn from very little children, for the
hearts of little children are pure, and therefore,
the Great Spirit may show to them many things which
older people miss. -
Black
Elk
Imagination is more
important than knowledge. For while
knowledge defines all we currently know and understand,
imagination points to all we might yet discover and create.
-Albert
Einstein
Be
willing to have it so. Acceptance of what has
happened is the first step to overcoming the
consequences of any misfortune. -William
James
It
is our duty to compose our character, not to compose
books; and to win, not battles and provinces,
but order and tranquility for our conduct of life.
-
Michel
Montaigne
To
live to our highest in all things that pertain to
us, and to lend a hand as best we can to all others
for this same end.
To
aid in righting the wrongs that cross our path by
pointing the wrong-doer to a better way, and thus
aid him or her in becoming a power for good.
To
turn toward and to keep our faces always to the
light, knowing that we are then always safe, and
that we shall travel with joy the open road.
To
love the fields and the wild flowers, the stars, the
far-open sea, the soft, warm earth, and to live much
with them alone; but to love struggling and weary
men and women and every pulsing, living creature
better.
To
do our own thinking, listening quietly to the
opinions of others, but to be sufficiently men and
women to act always upon our own convictions.
To
do our duty as we see it, regardless of the opinions
of others--seeming gain or loss, temporary blame or
praise.
To
remain in nature always sweet and simple and humble
and therefore strong.
To
play the part of neither fool nor knave by
attempting to judge another, but to give that same
time to living more worthily ourselves.
To
get up immediately when we stumble, face again to
the light, and travel on without wasting even a
moment in regret.
To
love and to hold due reverence for all people and
all things, but to stand in awe or fear of nothing
save our own wrong-doing.
To
recognize the good lying at the heart of all people,
of all things, waiting for expression all in its own
good way and time.
To
know that it is the middle ground that brings
pleasure and satisfaction, and that excesses have to
be paid for always with heavy and sometimes
frightful costs.
To
know that work, occupation, something definite and
useful to do, is one of the established conditions
of happiness in life.
To
realize always clearly that thoughts are forces,
that like creates like, and that to determine one's
thinking therefore is to determine one's own life.
To
take and to live always in the attitude of mind that
compels gladness, looking for and thus drawing to us
continually the best in all people and all things,
being thereby the creators of our own good fortunes.
To
know that the ever-conscious realization of the
essential oneness of each life with the Divine Life
is the highest of all knowledge, and that to open
ourselves as opportune channels for the Divine Power
to work in and through us is the open door to the
highest attainment, and to the best there is in
life.
In
brief--to be honest, to be fearless, to be just,
joyous, kind. This will make our part in
life's great and as yet not fully understood play
one of greatest glory, and we need then stand in
fear of nothing--life nor death; for death is
life. Or rather, it is the quick transition to
life in another form; the putting off of the old
coat and the putting on of the new; a passing not
from light to darkness, but from light to light
according as we have lived here; a taking up of life
in another form where we leave it off here; a part
in life not to be shunned or dreaded or feared, but
to be welcomed with a glad and ready smile when it
comes in its own good way and time.
A
nice song for this week (I might have done this one fairly
recently, but I can't remember. It's worth seeing
twice, in any case!):
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Nitty-Gritty
Reasons
Jim Rohn
(excerpted from the book Seven Strategies
for Wealth and
Happiness)
Wouldn't it be wonderful to be motivated to achievement by such
a lofty goal as benevolence? I must confess, however, that
in the early years of my struggle to succeed, my motivation was
a lot more down-to-earth. My reason for succeeding was more
basic. In fact, it fell into the category of what I like
to call "nitty-gritty reasons." A nitty-gritty
reason is the kind that any one of us can have -- at any time,
on any day -- and it can cause our lives to change. Let me tell
you what happened to me.
I was lounging at home one day
when I heard a knock at the door. It was a timid, hesitant
knock. When I opened the door I looked down to see a pair
of big brown eyes staring up at me. There stood a frail
little girl of about ten. She told me, with all the courage and
determination her little heart could muster, that she was
selling Girl Scout cookies. It was a masterful
presentation -- several flavors, a special deal, and only two
dollars per box. How could anyone refuse? Finally, with a
big smile and ever-so politely, she asked me to buy. And I
wanted to. Oh, how I wanted to!
Except for one thing. I didn't have two dollars!
Boy, was I embarrassed! Here I was -- a father, had been to
college, was gainfully employed -- and yet I didn't have two
dollars to my name.
Naturally I couldn't tell this to the little girl with the big
brown eyes. So I did the next best thing. I lied to
her. I said, "Thanks, but I've already bought Girl
Scout cookies this year. And I've still got plenty stacked
in the house."
Now that simply wasn't true. But it was the only thing I
could think of to get me off the hook. And it did.
The little girl said, "That's okay, sir. Thank you
very much." And with that she turned around and went
on her way.
I stared after her for what seemed like a very long time.
Finally, I closed the door behind me and, leaning my back to it,
cried out, "I don't want to live like this anymore.
I've had it with being broke, and I've had it with lying. I'll
never be embarrassed again by not having any money in my
pocket." That day I promised myself to earn enough to
always have several hundred dollars in my pocket at all times.
This is what I mean by a nitty-gritty reason. It may not
win me any prize for greatness, but it was enough to have a
permanent effect on the rest of my life.
My
Girl-Scout-cookie story does have a happy ending. Several
years later, as I was walking out of my bank where I had just made
a hefty deposit and was crossing the street to get into my car, I
saw two little girls who were selling candy for some girls'
organization. One of them approached me, saying,
"Mister, would you like to buy some candy?"
"I probably would," I said playfully. "What
kind of candy do you have?" "It's almond roca."
"Almond roca. That's my favorite. How much is it?"
"It's only two dollars." Two dollars. It couldn't
be! I was excited. "How many boxes of candy have you
got?" "I've got five."
Looking at her friend, I said, "And how many boxes do you
have left?"
"I've
got four."
"That's
nine. Okay, I'll take them all."
At this, both girls' mouths fell open as they exclaimed in unison,
"Really?"
"Sure," I said. "I've got some friends that I'll
pass some around to."
Excitedly, they scurried to stack all the boxes together. I
reached into my pocket and gave them eighteen dollars. As I
was about to leave, the boxes tucked under my arm, one of the
girls looked up and said, "Mister, you're really
something!" How about that! Can you imagine spending
only eighteen dollars and having someone look you in the face and
say, "You're really something!"
Now you know why I always carry a few hundred dollars on me.
I'm not about to miss chances like that ever again.
And to think it all resulted from my own embarrassment, that when
properly channeled, acted as a powerful motivator to help me
achieve.
How about you? What nitty-gritty reasons do you have waiting
to challenging and provoke you into change for the better?
Look for them, they are there. Sometimes it can be as simple
as a brown-eyed girl selling Girl Scott cookies.
To Your Success,
Jim Rohn
* * * * *
Reproduced
with permission from the Jim Rohn Weekly E-zine
Living
Life Fully, the e-zine
exists to try to provide for visitors of the world wide web a
place
of growth, peace, inspiration, and encouragement. Our
articles
are presented as thoughts of the authors--by no means do
we
mean to present them as ways that anyone has to live
life. Take
from them what you will, and disagree with
whatever you disagree
with--just know that they'll be here for you
each week.
Once
we see that everything is impermanent and ungraspable
and that
we create a huge amount of suffering if we are
attached to things
staying the same, we realize that
relaxing and letting go is a wiser
way to live.
Letting
go does not mean not caring about things. It means
caring about them in a flexible and wise way.
I
was having a cup of coffee the other day when I saw
something nice--a young mother came in with her two
young kids and sat down with them for what looked to
be a nice time out with them. She bought them
something to eat and drink and everyone settled
in--and then she pulled out her cell phone and
called a friend to chat. What had seemed to be
some nice "togetherness" time turned into
her ignoring her kids while she talked on the phone
with a friend.
Last
week my wife and I were taking a walk when we saw a
young girl outside a store hanging out with her
boyfriend. They were hugging and talking to
each other in that clinging way that many
16-year-olds have, paying attention only to
themselves and each other. Unfortunately, two
little kids about five or six years old were sitting
on a short retaining wall nearby, looking on.
The girl obviously was babysitting, and she had
brought the kids to the store so that she could meet
with her boyfriend.
Pay
attention. It's all about paying attention.
Attention is vitality. It connects you with others.
It makes you eager. Stay eager.
Susan Sontag
It
was sad for me to see these two instances, for I
know that they aren't exactly uncommon.
Unfortunately, many people aren't willing or able to
pay undivided attention to kids, or to anything else
in their lives for that matter. Many people
aren't able to focus entirely on work when they're
at work, and others aren't able to focus on school
when they're there. It isn't always a question
of attention deficit disorders, either--it's a
question of choice.
The
woman in the cafe chose to be on the phone with a
friend rather than sit and talk with her kids.
The girl who was babysitting chose to pay attention
to her boyfriend and ignore the kids. These
were only public occurrences--how often are kids
ignored while the parents do things that they want
to do, either at home or in the car or while on
vacation? How often do people choose to surf
the Internet and leave the job they're getting paid
to do undone for the moment? How often are we
thinking of other things while having a conversation
with someone? How often do we try to do two or
three jobs at a time, instead of focusing all of our
attention on one particular task?
And
how often do we put other people, ourselves, and our
loved ones in significant danger (study after study
backs up this claim) by talking on cell phones,
reading, eating, or even watching movies while we're
driving our cars, rather than paying undivided
attention to our driving?
Mindfulness
means
paying attention
in a particular way;
on purpose,
in the present moment,
and nonjudgmentally.
Jon
Kabat-Zinn
In his book Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance,
Robert Pirsig mentions a trip to a mechanic's shop, and
finding out that part of the reason that they did lousy
work there was because they had a radio blaring loud music
in the shop, which kept the mechanics there from focusing
completely on the task at hand. The people who
worked there were more interested in finishing the day and
going home than they were in doing a very good job, and
because of that, the jobs they did were quite poor.
Dividing
our attention almost always means that the results
of our actions are less effective than they would be if
we were to give our undivided attention.
Undivided attention helps us to be completely
present in the moment, and it helps us to see more
of and learn more about whatever we do. It
helps us to achieve results that most of us only
dream of, yet most of us truly never have learned
what it means to give our undivided attention.
We've grown up in cultures that seem to value
accomplishment of many things over all else, and we
reward people who split their attention and efforts
between several tasks.
Personally,
I have a very difficult time giving my undivided
attention--it takes a great deal of effort on my
part to keep focused on just one thing at a time,
but I do try, with varying degrees of success.
One promise that I've made to myself, though, is
always to do my best to stay completely focused when
I'm with kids, for there are few things more
important in young people's lives than to be with
adults who are willing to give them their undivided
attention. Such attention gives them the
unmistakable message that they're worth that
attention, that someone is interested in them for
exactly who they are. Giving them only part of
my attention can send the message that there are
other things more important than them.
It's
been important to me to practice paying
attention. Sometimes I stop and look at
something for a while, and I try to recognize the
other thoughts that come into my mind while I'm
looking. If I'm looking at a flower, for
example, and I start to think about a letter that I
have to write, I do my best to recognize that
thought and push it out of my mind by re-focusing on
the flower, or some particular part of the
flower. I try to see parts of the flower that
I've never noticed before, and I look for patterns
that might have escaped me. This practice
helps me when I'm talking to friends and thinking
about all I have to do today--I do my best to
refocus on our conversation, leaving that stuff for
later.
Mindfulness
can be summed up in two words:
pay attention. Once you notice what you’re
doing, you have the power to
change it.
Michelle
Burford
This type of attention is an important element of
meditation, for example. One of the most common ways
of entering a meditative state is to focus on your own
breathing, with the goal of eventually noticing nothing
else but the breathing, trying to empty the mind of the
many distracting thoughts that keep us from the centers of
our being, that part of us that is truly who we are.
We
hear a lot about "living in the present
moment," and I'm completely convinced that the
only way we truly can do so is by learning how to
give our undivided attention to whatever it is that
deserves that attention right now. Once we
divide it, we lose out on much of what is bright and
beautiful, right here, right now.
It took a lot of effort for me not to go
over and talk to those little kids who were being
ignored by their mother in a public place, just to
say hi. And
I know that I would have been the one to benefit the
most from that conversation--just as the mother
could have benefited greatly from paying some attention to
her children.
I
have not the courage
to search
through books
for
beautiful
prayers. . . Unable either to
say them
all or
choose between
them,
I do
as a child
would
do
who cannot
read--I say just
what I
want to say to God,
quite simply,
and he
never
fails to understand.
St.
Therese of Lisieux
I
can't remember when I first met Maggie. She blended in
with
the sand and surf. You could see her walking along the
shore
in her white tennis shoes, floppy straw hat, and oversized
print
dress. She always carried a crumpled brown paper bag
that matched
the texture and color of her skin. I remember her most
vividly at
daybreak or in the evening when I went out jogging, but I
later
discovered that her walks were regulated by the tides, not
by
the sun or clock. She came out at low tide when the
beach was wide and smooth.
Maggie
always walked with her head down. She would stop now
and then and pick something up, examine it, and either
discard it
or put it in the brown sack. I assumed she was
collecting shells. We had a nodding and then a grunting acquaintance for many
months
before I ventured to ask her what kind of shells she was
after.
"Not
shells at all," she retorted in an accent more
appropriate to Maine
than Florida. No wasted words here. Phrases, not
sentences, communicated
her purpose and her desire for privacy.
"Glass." She threw away a green
pebble that had once been a beer bottle. "Sharp
glass. Cuts the feet. Surfers land on it. It sure ruins their summer."
Bob
Libby
I get
many poems and letters containing healthy humor
that grows out
of the author's affliction. These
wise people are seeing life in its
fullest and not
making the affliction the central point of their
existence. Laughter can always remove fear and anxiety,
no matter
what the situation. You can't suffer when
you are laughing. The two
just can't be experienced
together. It has to be one or the other, and
joy
always overcomes fear. Love creates, but laughter is
the cement that holds our lives together.
Yes, life
can be mysterious and confusing--but there's much of life that's
actually rather dependable and reliable. Some principles apply
to life in so many different contexts that they can truly be called
universal--and learning what they are and how to approach them and use
them can teach us some of the most important lessons that we've ever
learned.
My doctorate is in Teaching and Learning. I use it a lot when I
teach at school, but I also do my best to apply what I've learned to
the life I'm living, and to observe how others live their lives.
What makes them happy or unhappy, stressed or peaceful, selfish or
generous, compassionate or arrogant? In this book, I've done my
best to pass on to you what I've learned from people in my life,
writers whose works I've read, and stories that I've heard.
Perhaps these principles can be a positive part of your life, too! Universal Principles of Living Life Fully. Awareness of
these principles can explain a lot and take much of the frustration
out of the lives we lead.
Explore all of our
quotations pages--these links will take you to the first page of each
topic, and those pages will contain links to any additional pages on
the same topic (there are five pages on adversity, for example).
™
