Good day, and
welcome to autumn! And to those who live down
under,
welcome to spring! We hope that wherever you
are and whatever the weather
is doing there, you're able to make the most of this
new season in our lives!
Far
away in the sunshine are my highest aspirations.
I may not reach them, but I can look up and see the
beauty, believe in them and try to follow where they
lead. -Louisa
May Alcott
People
are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. The people who get on in this world are they who get up
and look
for the circumstances they want, and, if they
can't find them, make them.
-George Bernard Shaw
We
should be taught not to wait for inspiration to start a
thing. Action always generates inspiration. Inspiration seldom generates action.
-Frank
Tibolt
Many
of us spend our whole lives running from feeling with
the mistaken belief that you can not bear the pain. But
you have already borne the pain. What you have not
done is feel all you are beyond that pain. -
Khalil
Gibran
To
relax, to feel the love in your heart and keep to that as
your focus in every situation--that's the meaning of
spiritual surrender. It changes us. We become
deeper, more attractive people.
In
Zen Buddhism, there's a concept called "zen
mind," or "beginner's mind." They say
that the mind should be like an empty rice bowl. If
it's already full, then the universe can't fill it.
If it's empty, it has room to receive. This means
that when we think we have things already figured out,
we're not teachable. Genuine insight can't dawn on a
mind that's not open to receive it. Surrender is a
process of emptying the mind.
In
the Christic tradition, this is the meaning of
"becoming as a little child." Little
children don't think they know what things mean. In
fact, they know they don't know. They ask someone
older and wiser to explain things to them. We're
like children who don't know, but think we do.
The
wise person doesn't pretend to know what it's impossible
to know. "I don't know" can be an
empowering statement. When we go into a situation
not knowing, there is something inside us which does.
With our conscious mind, we step back in order that a
higher power within us can step forward and lead the way.
We
need less posturing and more genuine charisma.
Charisma was originally a religious term, meaning "of
the spirit," or "inspired." It's
about letting God's light shine through us.
It's
about a sparkle in people that money can't buy. It's
an invisible energy with visible effects. To let go,
to just love, is not to fade into the wallpaper.
Quite the contrary, it's when we truly become
bright. We're letting our own light shine.
We
are meant to be this way. We are meant to
shine. Look at small children. They're all so
unique before they start trying to be, because they
demonstrate the power of genuine humility. This is
also the explanation of "beginner's luck."
When we go into a situation not knowing the rules, we
don't pretend to know how to figure anything out, and we
don't know yet what there is to be afraid of. This
releases the mind to create from its own higher
power. Situations shift gear and lights go on simply
because our minds have opened up to receive love. We
have gotten out of our own way.
Love
is a win-mode, a successful and attractive
vibration. We think that success is difficult, and
so, for us it is. Success in life doesn't have to
involve negative tension. We don't have to be
struggling all the time. If you think about it,
"taking the bull by the horns" would be a very
dangerous thing to do. In fact, ambitious tension
actually limits our ability to succeed because it keeps us
in a state of contraction, emotionally and
physically. It seems to give us energy but doesn't
really, like the white sugar of mental health; there's a
short high, followed by a crash. The cultivation of
mental rest, or surrender, is like eating healthy
food. It doesn't give us an immediate rush, but over
time it provides a lot more energy.
This
doesn't require sitting in a lotus position all day.
We still get excited, but more gently. Many people
associate a spiritual life with a grade B movie, but God
doesn't get rid of all the drama in our lives. He
just gets rid of the cheap drama. There is no
higher drama than true personal growth. Nothing
could be more genuinely dramatic than boys becoming real
men and girls becoming real women.
Something
amazing happens when we surrender and just love. We
melt into another world, a realm of power already within
us. The world changes when we change. The
world softens when we soften. The world loves us
when we choose to love the world.
Surrender
means the decision to stop fighting the world, and to
start loving it instead. It is a gentle liberation
from pain. But liberation isn't about breaking out
of anything; it's a gentle melting into who we really
are. We let down our armor, and discover the
strength of our selves. A Course in Miracles
tells us that although we think that without the ego, all
would be chaos, the opposite is true. Without the
ego, all would be love.
We
are simply asked to shift focus and to take on a more
gentle perception. That's all God needs. Just
one sincere surrendered moment, when love matters more
than anything, and we know that nothing else really
matters at all. What he gives us in return for our
openness to him, is an outpouring of his power from deep
within us. We are given his power to share with the
world, to heal all wounds, to awaken all hearts.
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One of
the most famous quotes of Einstein is when he said,
"Imagination is more important than
knowledge." Einstein was putting value on
creativity here. His theories and ideas were all about
creativity. When he made a working box car for his son
out of shoe string and some boxes, that was creativity.
When he was down and out and needed money and posted an
ad for tutoring lessons; that was creativity in making
money.
Since
Einstein accomplished some of the greatest thoughts of
our time, an argument could be made that he was one of
the most creative people of all time. You can know more
about your product than anyone and have more degrees
than anyone you know, but if you don't have a little bit
of creativity to take advantage of what you do have,
then it is useless.
Credentials
and knowledge will do you little good if you lack the
creativity to take advantage of them. Einstein once
said, "The secret to creativity is knowing how to
hide your sources." I think he was being a little
humble and a lot humorous here, but he was once again
acknowledging the importance of being creative!
So you
may ask yourself, "What is creativity?"
That is
an excellent question -- let's go straight to the source
to answer it. Einstein said, "CREATIVITY is seeing
what others see and THINKING what no one else has
thought."
Robert
Kennedy said the same thing this way, "I look at
things that are and I ask why? I look at things that
never were and ask why not?" Robert Kennedy was
talking about creativity, just as Einstein was.
So how
do you do it? How do you model the creativity of Albert
Einstein?
First
of all, we need to address the idea of the limiting
belief that you are not creative.
There
is a prevailing belief that creativity is an inborn
trait - you are either creative or you're not. Well,
while creativity is an inborn trait, we are all born
with a creative brain (your right cerebral hemisphere)
and have many creative skills. Children are naturally
curious and eager to explore the world around them and
spend hours playing with toys, making up imaginary
friends and pretend games. But as we get older, we begin
to lose some of our natural creativity as we learn and
use more left-brain thinking skills in school and at
work. Research shows that our propensity to generate
original ideas reduces from 90% at age 5, to 20% at age
7 and even further to 2% as adults! However, unless you
have suffered brain damage in your right hemisphere or
had it surgically removed, you still have a creative
brain; so you are still creative. It's just that maybe
you don't use your creativity skills as much as you used
to.
Now for
the good news! You can reawaken your creative
brainpower.
What
would Einstein tell you in regards to increasing your
creativity? Well, we don't have to guess on that one,
because he did tell us. He said, "The important
thing is to not stop questioning. Curiosity has its own
reason for existing."
Develop
the curiosity of a child. Leonardo Da Vinci, who is said
to be one of the greatest geniuses of all time, also had
this creativity. I don't think that it is a coincidence
that Leonardo and Einstein were both extremely creative
and that so many years after their deaths we are still
talking about them.
Let me
give you a few of Da Vinci credentials:
500
years ago he:
- drew
blue prints for the worlds first helicopter
- drew blueprints for a submarine
- built an extendable ladder that is still being used by
fire departments today
- built the world's first hydraulic jack
- built a rotating stage
- and 500 years ago he build a water powered alarm
clock!
Those
are some pretty amazing credentials if you ask me.
Curiosity
might have "killed the cat" but it can help
you think like a genius. Leonardo Da Vinci had a book of
questions. In this journal of sorts he would write down
questions as fast as they would pop into his head. He
would write down questions such as:
why do
birds fly?
why do
they slow down as they land?
what do
their feathers do?
The
interesting thing is that he didn't worry about the
answers. He simply wrote down the questions because he
knew something about the power of the human mind. He
knew the subconscious mind was powerful and if he wrote
down the questions his subconscious mind would continue
to work on the answers.
Creativity
is defined by Webster as "creative ability or
intellectual inventiveness." This is a skill that
everyone has to some extent. There are ways to improve
your ability to create and generate new ideas. Not
everyone can be a great artist or a creative genius, but
it makes sense to make the most of the potential we are
given.
Brainstorming
is an extremely good way at practicing creativity. A
brainstorm can work with an individual or a group. This
technique requires the generation of as many ideas as
quickly as possible to solve a problem.
It does
not matter how outlandish an idea might be, all ideas
are written down. The ideas need to be written down, and
a time limit should be imposed for accepting ideas. If
this is a group brainstorm, an individual should be
appointed as recorder to write down the ideas. If this
is an individual project, the person should write as the
thoughts come. Remember the less judgment of ideas the
greater the number of ideas generated. Although many of
the ideas may be unreasonable and ineffective, they may
lead you to the idea that will really work. It is
helpful to set a goal for the number of ideas you wish
to generate. This will give you something to work
toward, and may unleash the perfect solution.
Journal
your thoughts for future use. This includes writing down
dreams, insights, experiences, quotes, problems with
friends, and any other information that is pertinent to
you. This should have some kind of organization so you
can look back on it periodically. You may find the
answer to a problem in last month's dream, so remember
to review these personal logs frequently. This system
will compliment the complex subconscious mind, and allow
you to retrieve from this boundless resource.
Allow
your ideas to develop and follow through on them. It is
said that a good idea is worth fifty cents, and the plan
to implement that plan is worth millions of dollars. It
has been said another way as well: Anyone who has ever
taken a shower has had an idea. It is the man who gets
out of the shower, dries off and does something about it
that changes the world.
As you
learn about creativity and the techniques that work best
for you, a whole new world will open up to you.
Creativity can be helpful in problem solving, dealing
with people, and creating success in all areas of your
life. Take the time to tap into your greatest power, the
power of the imagination and increase your creativity in
all areas of life.
Sometimes
when we face a problem we struggle with our thoughts so
much, our energy is spent. The stress that comes with
this kind of problem solving also affects how we think.
If the anxiety level becomes too high, parts of the
brain will shut down and it is impossible to generate
the ideas needed to deal with the problem. When faced
with too much stress the mind goes into the "fight
or flight" mode. This allows the mind to deal with
only two alternatives, fighting the opponent or fleeing
the danger.
You can
avoid these mind numbing emotions by altering your
environment. When you feel yourself getting stressed out
or you begin losing your focus, walk away from
everything for a change of scenery. Allow yourself to
focus on another task. Some people, golf, juggle, or
exercise to get away from their mind blocks. When you
return to this important task, you will have shifted
from your stressed out mind set to a new relaxed and
ready to conquer attitude.
Blaise
Pascal said, "Almost all of the problems of mankind
arise from the inability to be alone with oneself in a
room for any period of time."
Getting
away from the problem allows your subconscious mind to
problem solve, while your conscious mind is occupied
with other things. Sometimes you will find the solution
to your problem in your sleep. This is when the
subconscious mind is most active. Basically, all your
experiences and learnings are stored in this part of the
brain. This is where your creativity gets turbo-powered.
If you can tap into this force you will have creative
powers beyond your wildest expectations.
Another
good way to help your creativity is to read. That is
right, read. You see when you read your
subconscious mind is automatically creating pictures
whether you like it or not. So develop a passion for
reading and watch your creativity increase. Both
Einstein and Da Vinci were avid readers. Model this
behavior and watch your creativity increase.
Einstein
said that he would simply imagine it so and then go
about to prove it. In other words the creative process
occurred before the experiments.
Ron
White
Living
Life Fully, the e-zine
exists to try to provide for visitors of the world wide web a
place
of growth, peace, inspiration, and encouragement. Our
articles
are presented as thoughts of the authors--by no means do
we
mean to present them as ways that anyone has to live
life. Take
from them what you will, and disagree with
whatever you disagree
with--just know that they'll be here for you
each week.
You can
search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more
deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person
is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody
in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.
the Buddha
Forgiveness
It's sometimes amazing just how difficult it can be to forgive
people. It's also sometimes amazing to see just how
thoughtless and inconsiderate and even hurtful other people can
be, and how much damage they can do to us emotionally,
financially, spiritually, and physically. There are many
people in this world who are so focused on their own wants, needs,
and fears that they do whatever they feel is necessary to take
care of themselves, and in the process they harm others.
Needless to say, when they do this, they often harm us, and then
we have to decide whether or not we're going to forgive them.
This isn't necessarily easy to do. When someone hurts me,
for example, I know that every time I see that person in the
future, that hurt is brought to mind. In a very real way, I
re-experience that hurt. And though I may want to forgive
that person completely, that new feeling of hurt is sometimes just
as difficult to deal with as the original hurt was. In
addition to this problem, the chances are that I've learned that I
now can't trust this person, so even if I do fully forgive him or
her, can I still work with this person as if nothing has
happened? Can I spend time with this person even though
doing so brings to the surface very negative and painful emotions?
If we can forgive everyone, regardless of
what he or she
may have done,
we nourish the soul and
allow our whole
being to feel good. To hold a
grudge
against anyone is
like carrying the devil on your
shoulders. It is our
willingness
to forgive and
forget that casts away such
a burden
and brings light
into our
hearts, freeing us
from many ill feelings
against our fellow human beings.
Sydney Banks
There are those
people who make it sound as if forgiveness were
simple, as if it's just a question of making a
decision to forgive, and suddenly life is
fine. If that were true, then life would be
much easier, and we wouldn't face so many dilemmas
about whom to trust and how to treat others.
Forgiveness, though, is not simple at all, and it
needs to be given its due as one of the more
difficult acts that we will perform while we're
alive. That definitely doesn't mean that it's
impossible, but unless we recognize it for the
difficult act that it is, we can't give forgiveness
the respect that it deserves.
Forgiveness, after all, usually isn't something that
benefits the other person as much as it benefits us,
ourselves. When we're holding a grudge, after
all, our minds are constantly focused on the hurt
and the pain that we've experienced because of
someone else's actions. It's even worse when
the hurt was completely undeserved, for our minds
are then focused on seeing ourselves as victims,
too--we're not only focused on resentment and anger,
but we're also focused on self-pity.
Forgiveness is about allowing ourselves to leave
these feelings behind and move on, thus making our
own lives more positive and our own days
brighter. Forgiving allows us to put all of
our energy and focus into positive pursuits rather
than splitting our focus between what we want to do
and feel today and what has happened to us in
the past.
While it is important to acknowledge that something
wrong has happened and that we have every right to
hold a grudge if we wish to, we also have to keep in
mind that we also have a right to hold a lit match
up to our arm for twenty seconds. The only
difference between the two is that with the match,
we actually see and feel the damage that we're doing
to ourselves--there's no chance of us thinking that
the burn is hurting someone else. With our
grudges and resentment, though, we're also damaging
ourselves--it's just that when we hurt ourselves
that way, we don't necessarily see and feel or
recognize the hurt that we're doing ourselves and
our spirits. But the damage is real, and we
don't actually see it or feel it until we do
forgive, and we realize what a tremendous weight on
our spirits we're leaving behind.
Forgiveness gives us the capacity to make a new
start. . . And
forgiveness
is the grace by which you enable the other person to
get up, and get
up
with dignity, to begin anew. . . In the act of
forgiveness we are
declaring
our faith in the future of a relationship
and in the capacity
of the wrongdoer to change.
There are a few
very important aspects of forgiveness that are
important to keep in mind if we truly want to free
ourselves of our burdens. First of all,
forgiveness can't be conditional. We can't
say, "I'll forgive you if you change your
ways." If we do this, then we're not
really forgiving at all--and we keep our burdens
with us as we watch to make sure that this person
actually "deserves" our forgiveness.
But we're the ones who deserve that forgiveness more
than the other person, and expecting that person to
change is keeping ourselves from experiencing the
positive effects of forgiveness. Besides, it's
not up to us to control anyone else's life, and
we're bound to experience frustration if we do
try. Also, forgiveness must be complete, but
it must also be given in awareness that the person
may hurt us again, and that we may end up having to
forgive again.
That said, it's also important to keep in mind that
the fact that we've forgiven someone doesn't mean
that we now have to hand around that person as if
nothing ever happened. With most family
members, we do want to be with them still, but
that's not true of everyone. If someone has
violated our trust in a significant way and we think
it's possible that it will happen again, then it's
important that we make an intelligent decision and
not deal with that person in the same ways
again. Forgiveness does not necessarily lead
to reconciliation.
Finally, forgiveness doesn't always have to be
expressed to the person we're forgiving. If
someone made a hurtful comment about us but is
completely oblivious to that fact, it may or may not
be useful to tell him or her that we forgive
them. Sometimes it's important that we free
our hearts and spirits of the burden, but keep the
fact that we've done so to ourselves. If it
won't help the other person at all, perhaps it's
better that we don't share with that person.
Forgiveness of self is where
all forgiveness starts. If I
am unable
to forgive myself, it is impossible for me to
truly forgive others. And I must forgive others. What I
give out is what I receive.
If I want forgiveness, I have to give forgiveness.
Betty also
brings up a very important point about
forgiveness--sometimes the most difficult person of
all to forgive is one's self, for we know our own
motivations and we're intimately familiar with our
acts and the words we say. Forgiveness does
have to begin with ourselves, for if we don't
forgive ourselves, we're not in a position to
forgive anyone else--or at least, our efforts to do
so most definitely will not have the positive
effects that they should have. We will also
need to be forgiven by others for our own misdeeds
and mistakes, so withholding forgiveness--of
ourselves and others--most definitely will come back
to affect us strongly at some point in our futures.
Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Live
your life without resentment and anger and repressed
hostility, and you'll find that your mind and spirit
feel freer, lighter, healthier. If we are
going to live our lives fully, we can't spend them
being dragged down by negative feelings. And
the release of those feelings lies within us, and in
the decisions we make--even if the decisions are
among the most difficult we'll make in our lives.
Solitude
can become your most meaningful companion and it can assist you in
being a more giving person in your spiritual partnerships.
Rather than regarding your partner's need for time alone as a
threat, see it as a time of renewal that you celebrate. Make
every effort to help each other have that space. Treat that
space as sacred.
Sir
William Osler, visiting one of London's leading
children's hospitals, noticed that in a convalescent
ward all the children were clustered at one end of the
room dressing their dolls, playing games and playing in
the sandbox--all except one little girl, who sat
forlornly on the edge of her high, narrow bed, hungrily
clutching a cheap doll.
The
great physician looked at the lonely little figure, then
at the ward nurse. "We've tried to get Susan
to play," the nurse whispered, "but the other
children just won't have anything to do with her.
You see, no one comes to see her. Her mother is
dead, and her father has been here just once--he brought
her that doll. The children have a strange
code. Visitors mean so much. If you don't
have any visitors, you are ignored."
Sir
William walked over to the child's bed and asked, in a
voice loud enough for the others to hear, "May I
sit down, please?" The little girl's eyes lit
up. "I can't stay very long for this
visit," Osler went on, "but I have wanted to
see you so badly." For five minutes he sat
talking with her, even inquiring about her doll's health
and solemnly pulling out his stethoscope to listen to
the doll's chest. And as he left, he turned to the
youngster and said in a carrying voice, "You won't
forget our secret, will you? And mind, don't tell
anyone."
At
the door he looked back. His new friend was now
the center of a curious and admiring throng.
Ideally,
every human being ought to live each passing moment of his
or her life as if the next moment were to be his or her
last. We ought
to be able to live in the constant expectation of immediate
death and
to live like this, not morbidly, but serenely.
Arnold
Toynbee
Yes, life
can be mysterious and confusing--but there's much of life that's
actually rather dependable and reliable. Some principles apply
to life in so many different contexts that they can truly be called
universal--and learning what they are and how to approach them and use
them can teach us some of the most important lessons that we've ever
learned.
My doctorate is in Teaching and Learning. I use it a lot when I
teach at school, but I also do my best to apply what I've learned to
the life I'm living, and to observe how others live their lives.
What makes them happy or unhappy, stressed or peaceful, selfish or
generous, compassionate or arrogant? In this book, I've done my
best to pass on to you what I've learned from people in my life,
writers whose works I've read, and stories that I've heard.
Perhaps these principles can be a positive part of your life, too! Universal Principles of Living Life Fully. Awareness of
these principles can explain a lot and take much of the frustration
out of the lives we lead.
Explore all of our
quotations pages--these links will take you to the first page of each
topic, and those pages will contain links to any additional pages on
the same topic (there are five pages on adversity, for example).
™
