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18 March 2008 |
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Actualization
of self cannot be sought as a goal in its own right. . . . Rather,
it seems to be a by-product of active commitment of one's talents to
some cause, outside the self, such as the quest for beauty, truth,
or justice.
Sidney
M. Jourard
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There is no such thing as chance; and that which seems
to us blind accident actually stems from the deepest source of all.
Friedrich von Schiller
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We live on the brink of
disaster because we do not know how to let life alone. We do not
respect the living and fruitful contradictions and paradoxes of which true
life is full.
Thomas Merton
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Accepting
Yourself Unconditionally
Brian Tracy
Self-acceptance
begins in infancy, with the influence of your parents and
siblings and other important people. Your own level of
self-acceptance is determined largely by how well you feel you
are accepted by the important people in your life.
Your attitude
toward yourself is determined largely by the attitudes that you
think other people have toward you. When you believe that other
people think highly of you, your level of self-acceptance and
self-esteem goes straight up.
The best way to
build a healthy personality involves understanding yourself and
your feelings.
Letting the
Light Shine In
This is
achieved through the simple exercise of self-disclosure. For you
to truly understand yourself, or to stop being troubled by
things that may have happened in your past, you must be able to
disclose yourself to at least one person. You have to be able to
get those things off your chest. You must rid yourself of those
thoughts and feelings by revealing them to someone who won't
make you feel guilty or ashamed for what has happened.
Become Aware of
Your Feelings
The second part
of personality development follows from self-disclosure, and
it's called self-awareness.
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Only when you can disclose what
you're truly thinking and feeling to someone else can you become
aware of those thoughts and emotions. If the other person simply
listens to you without commenting or criticizing, you have the
opportunity to become more aware of the person you are and why
you do the things you do. You begin to develop perspective, or
what Buddhists call "detachment."
Accept the
Person You Are
Now we come to
the good part. After you've gone through self-disclosure to
self-awareness, you arrive at self-acceptance. You accept
yourself for the person you are, with good points and bad
points, with strengths and weaknesses, and with the normal
frailties of a human being. When you develop the ability to
stand back and look at yourself honestly, and to candidly admit
to others that you may not be perfect but you're all you've got,
you start to enjoy a heightened sense of self-acceptance.
Do an Inventory
of Your Accomplishments
A valuable
exercise for developing higher levels of self-acceptance
involves doing an inventory of yourself. In doing this
inventory, your job is to accentuate the positive and minimize
the negative. Think of your unique talents and abilities. Think
of your core skills, the things that you do exceptionally well
that account for your success in your profession and in your
personal life right now.
Think About
Your Future
Think about
your future possibilities and the fact that your potential is
virtually unlimited. You can do what you want to do and go where
you want to go. You can be the person you want to be. You can
set large and small goals and make plans and move step-by-step,
progressively toward their realization. There are no obstacles
to what you can accomplish except the obstacles that you create
in your mind.
Action
Exercises
First, sit down
with your spouse, or a good friend, and tell him or her about
something that is troubling you and is still causing you
unhappiness.
Second, develop
perspective on your problem by standing back from it and
imagining that it was happening to someone else. What advice
would you give to that person?
Third, think
continually about the good experiences and accomplishments you
have enjoyed in the past. Remind yourself regularly that you are
a pretty good person and you've done a lot of good things in
your life.
Reproduced with permission from the Jim Rohn Weekly E-zine.
Subscribe at: www.jimrohn.com or send an email with Join in the
subject to: mailto:subscribe@jimrohn.com
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To
Touch Someone
Joseph J. Mazzella
There are so
many gifts that you can give to others in this world that I can't
even begin to name them all. There are gifts of nature,
kindness, love, and joy. There are gifts of beauty,
simplicity, goodness, and delight. There are gifts that come
from the wallet and gifts that come from the heart. One of the
greatest gifts that you can give to another I have found, though, is
to simply touch them.
I can't tell
you the surge of joy that I feel in my heart each time that one of
my children gives me a hug. It is a heart-raising,
mind-uplifting, and soul-inspiring experience. Getting a hug
sends the electricity of love straight to my heart and brightens my
day in every way. It doesn't end with just hugs, either.
A gentle kiss, a pat on the back, a touch of the hand all provide
love, joy, and delight as well. Even the simple act of petting
my dogs or cats can bring me peace, happiness, contentment, and
oneness with life that I can't get on my own. The truth is
that we need to touch each other. It lets the souls we carry
in these bodies connect with each other in love and joy, and that is
what we are here for.
Don't be
afraid to touch someone, then. God in His wondrous love didn't
just give us this skin to hold our bones and muscles together.
Hug someone you care about. Show them you love them with a
gentle squeeze, a pat on the back, or a touch of the hand. If
they are not there to touch physically, then touch them mentally,
emotionally, or spiritually instead. A letter, a card, or a
call can still carry the love and joy within you and touch the heart
and soul of another. Just remember that God put us here to
love each other, care for each other, help each other, and to touch
each other.
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Your
mission statement becomes your
constitution, the solid expression of your vision
and values. It becomes the criterion by which
you measure everything else in your life. . . . Writing or
reviewing a mission statement changes you because it
forces you to think through your priorities deeply,
carefully, and to align your behavior with your beliefs.
Stephen
Covey |
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'Til
You Find Your Dream!
Julie Jordan Scott
I was having a very pride-filled moment.
It was the third week in my voice class. I was flying
high, feeling the improvement of my voice deep within my bones.
It was deeper and richer, I had better breath control, there was
more resonance.
"I am now an ACTIVE singer", I smiled smugly to
myself.
Amber, my youthful and talented teacher, separated the five
assembled students into three groups. She placed me in a
group all by myself. I was responsible for holding the
highest notes. I thought I held my own quite capably.
I was feeling very satisfied with myself when it came time for
me to practice my song one-on-one with Amber.
After I had been busily belting it out for a moment, Amber
stopped me and said, "You know, you don't have to sing it
so largely all the time. In fact, it would be a lot more
interesting if you would. . ."
I have been a teacher long enough to recognize the searching in
her facial expression.
I stepped out of "prideful singer mode" momentarily
and said, "If I would harness it?"
Relief flooded Amber's face. "Yes, exactly. Go
through the music and pay close attention to the notes you
believe are the most important." She made some notes
on my music. "Look at the differences and sing drama
into your song. Let it tell its story without needing to
sing it all the same. It will be so much prettier when you
simply do that."
I really heard and felt what Amber was teaching me. Being
an ACTIVE singer, for example, does not mean being a LOUD
singer.
It's like living a PASSIONATE life does not necessarily mean
living a LOUD life. It does not mean your life is
comprised of one note that is like a huge bonfire.
It means living a life based in the heart. Based in love.
Based in connecting to your source of creativity, your
wellspring of joy and fullness and contentment.
I dutifully listened to Amber's words and suggestions without
once going into "I did badly, I didn't sing this right, I
will not ever get this song down."
Instead, I listened carefully and constructively. As I
drove away from class, I immediately started practicing some of
the very ideas she was suggesting.
Through integrating what Amber prescribed, the next day the
quality of my performance had improved multifold. My voice
was harnessed so that I could work with it to create a
congruent, melodic flowing message of passion that reached
beyond just singing loud. I had developed into crafting the
performance with my voice deeply centered in singing from truth.
The honesty of the lyrics from "Climb Every Mountain"
create a call to each singer and listener to honor their dreams.
Add to that the facts of my life as I stand on stage seriously
practicing a craft I deserted for close to thirty years and you
will find an anthem that has become my prayer.
Join me in singing and thinking and bringing to life:
"Follow every rainbow, 'til you find your dream!"
* * * * * * * * * *
Julie Jordan Scott is a Personal Success Coach who left her
career as a government bureaucrat and built a successful
coaching business.
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Living
Life Fully, the e-zine
exists to try to provide for
visitors of the world wide web a
place
of growth, peace,
inspiration, and encouragement. Our
articles
are presented
as thoughts of the authors--by no means do
we
mean
to present them as ways that anyone has to live
life. Take
from them what you will, and disagree with
whatever you
disagree
with--just know that they'll be here for you
each week. |
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Alone
in his car heading west, it's easy for Jason to feel sorry
for himself and mad at the world. But then he gives
a ride to Hector and learns life isn't as negative as we
sometimes see it. The friendship between this young
man and his 70-year-old passenger is an inspiring story of
love and of dealing with obstacles in life. It's a
story that you'll treasure long after you've finished
reading. Three
Cavaliers, Tom Walsh's second published novel, is now available in book form! Click
on the image to the left to order! |
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Simple
Pleasures
T.W. Winslow
Standing
in the check-out line at our local grocery store this weekend, my
daughter asked if she could buy a roll of LifeSavers candy with part
of her weekly allowance. I told her she could and she made her
purchase.
Later
that day I noticed her partial roll of LifeSavers on the kitchen
counter. I picked up the candy and gazed at the brightly colored
packaging. There's just something nostalgic about a roll of
Lifesavers. It had been years since I'd bought a roll and
quickly popped one of the round candies into my mouth.
I'd
forgotten just how good these things are, and as I savored the candy
I had to chuckle at myself for just how much I was enjoying it. I
plopped down in my favorite over-stuffed chair and closed my eyes,
continuing to suck on the small round candy. My mind drifted back to
my childhood and I recalled what a special treat a roll of
LifeSavers was back then. Money was tight when I was growing up and
we didn't often get such treats. My mind went from one memory to the
next...
I
thought of the time my little brother super-glued his toes together.
I recalled the many scrapes my older brother and I got into and how
long it had been since we really talked. I saw the faces of friends
I hadn't seen in years, remembered my first real crush on a girl,
and thought back to the many late night talks my mom and I used to
have. I crunched the last of the LifeSaver and swallowed. As I laid
my head back into the soft chair I realized I was smiling. It's
funny, I thought, how something as simple as a piece of candy
could be so strangely satisfying.
For
the rest of that day my mind was occupied with thoughts of simple
pleasures. Those things which we often overlook or deny ourselves;
reading a good book, taking a walk by ourselves, playing in a pile
of freshly fallen leaves, holding hands, watching the summer sky for
falling stars, writing a letter to a friend, stopping to enjoy a
sunset, taking in the smells after a rainstorm, cuddling by the
fire, watching birds play in the morning sun...
How
easy it is to let slip by some of the most basic pleasures life has
to offer. But how simple it is to again find them. Perhaps all it
takes is a roll of LifeSavers and a few minutes of quiet
contemplation.
T.W. Winslow
used to be a common name seen around the internet a few years ago,
but he has since fallen out of sight, as have so many who dedicated
themselves to inspiring and motivating others (Gary Barnes, Robert
Taylor, Jim Stovall--there's quite a long list). We hope
they're doing well, wherever they may be, whatever they may be
doing.
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We've
been looking for a way to recommend many of the books
and movies that inspire us to live our lives more fully, and
Amazon
finally has provided it. Check out our new bookstore,
which is full
of inspirational and motivational material. We'd also
appreciate any
suggestions you might have of what to stock it with--please
visit
our feedback page
to make recommendations! |
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The
Arrow and the Song
I
shot an arrow into the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where;
For, so swiftly as it flew, the sight
Could not follow it in its flight.
I
breathed a song into the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where;
For who has sight so keen and strong,
That it can follow the flight of song?
Long,
long afterward, in an oak
I found the arrow, still unbroke;
And the song, from beginning to end,
I found again in the heart of a friend.
Henry
Wadsworth Longfellow
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