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30 January 2007 |
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Love
is the difficult
realization that something
other than oneself is real.
Iris
Murdoch
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When
you expect good, it's available constantly, and it makes itself a
reality in your life.
Alfre
Woodard
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most practical, beautiful, workable philosophy in the world won't
work--if you won't.
Zig
Ziglar
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A
strong positive mental
attitude will create more
miracles than any wonder drug.
Patricia
Neal
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Loosen
Your Grip on Worry
Jeff Keller
On an intellectual level, you know that worry does a lot more harm
than good. When you worry, your muscles tighten. Your
body aches. Your energy is drained. Charles H. Mayo
said that "worry affects the circulation, the heart, the
glands and the whole nervous system." Worse yet, your
worrying does absolutely nothing to change the conditions you're
worrying about!
That said, here's some encouraging news: you can learn to
loosen your grip on worry. What follows are some techniques
for reducing the amount of time you spend worrying:
1.
Don't fight worry. This is a battle where worry is going to
win in the end. There's an old saying, "What you
resist, persists." Have your ever said to yourself,
"I shouldn't be worried" or "I've got to stop
worrying?" Well, did it calm you down? No. You
tried to resist worry and it persisted. Telling yourself not
to worry is like telling yourself not to think about a
zebra. (What did you just think of?)
2. Recognize that worry is a choice you make. When you
look at worry as a choice, you'll be taking an important step in
reducing the amount of time you worry. A part of you will
begin to think, "Why would I ever continue to worry if I had
a choice in the matter?" You may not think of worry as
a choice because you developed the habit of worrying many years
ago.
You've trained your mind to worry in response to certain
stimuli. Fortunately, you can develop a new habit. You
can teach your mind to act in a more constructive way such as
being focused in the present moment or concentrating on something
positive.
3.
Clear your mind. There are certain disciplines that enhance
peace of mind and reduce worry and tension. Some of them
are: meditation, yoga, Zen, tai chi and various martial
arts. You can also clear your mind through prayer and by
releasing your worries to a Higher Power.
I can personally attest to the calming effect of yoga, having
taken classes for the last few years. Yoga postures and
relaxation exercises keep you in the present moment and open up
certain tension areas in the body.
Meditation also allows you to let go of worry thoughts and to
focus on the present moment, where there are no worries.
(While worrying, you are concentrating on what may happen in the
future.) Most people do not take advantage of these
disciplines because they involve effort and they take time to
learn. I suppose it all depends on how much you want to give up
worry and enjoy peace of mind!
You can also clear your mind with physical exercise. I'm
sure you've experienced this feeling of well-being many
times. You had a difficult day and you were worried about a
lot of things. You went to the gym or took a brisk walk.
After your exercise session, your mind was calm and at ease.
4. Prepare or take some constructive action. Often we
worry about how we're going to perform a certain task. For
example, we have to make a speech and we're concerned about how
the audience will respond. Instead of worrying, here's a
better approach: spend time preparing for the speech. The
more you practice and prepare, the more confident you'll
become. . . and the less you'll worry.
5.
Breathe. When you're worried, your breathing becomes very
shallow and your body is tense and uncomfortable. Whenever
you feel worried, take some slow, deep breaths and you will feel
calmer right away.
6. Limit your exposure to the media. We are under
attack. . . from the media! This barrage of negative news is
enough to make anyone worry. It has gotten to the point
where you can put on any news channel and hear about murders,
terrorism and catastrophes 24/7. There are panels of people
discussing every potential catastrophe they can imagine.
Ninety-nine point nine of these gloom and doom scenarios will
never happen, and yet they bombard our minds with this
poison. Do you really need to hear that stuff? How is it
helping you? You'd be hard pressed to find any stories that
increase your peace of mind or have any positive aspect. You
can get the news you need in a few minutes. Then shut off
the TV! (Newspapers and radio aren't much better, by the
way.)
7.
Cut yourself a little slack. We often worry that things
won't go exactly as we want. We expect perfection and then
struggle to somehow reach that ideal. If you continue with
that approach, you'll always be worrying because you're creating a
standard you can't consistently maintain.
If you're doing the best that you can, let that be enough.
Nobody lands the sale every time. . . nobody hits a home run in
every at-bat. . . and nobody makes a flawless presentation each
time. Be content with excellence and stop worrying about
being perfect.
8. Hang around people who don't worry. These people
really exist, and it's worth finding them. When you're in
the company of calm people, you'll feel calmer. Furthermore,
you can ask how they're able to avoid worrying. You can then
decide which of their strategies are appropriate for you.
Mark Twain once said, "I have spent most of my life worrying
about things that never happened." There's no question
that worry makes you sick and doesn't produce any beneficial
results. Yet, I don't think worry is a habit you can change
overnight. Rather, it's a subtle shift in where you place
your attention. You loosen your grip on worry
gradually. You can discipline your mind to spend more time
in the present moment or on something positive. It's well worth
the effort and your body, mind and spirit will thank you for it.
Jeff
Keller is the President of Attitude is Everything, Inc.
For more than 15 years, Jeff has delivered presentations
on attitude and motivation to businesses, groups and trade
associations throughout the United States and abroad. Jeff
is also the author of the highly acclaimed book, Attitude
is Everything. For more information, go to http://www.attitudeiseverything.com
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This is a very easy-to-read book that
packs a powerful punch. Jeff Keller has skipped over the
fluff and delivers a very practical and insightful
step-by-step recipe for expanding your vision of yourself
and your world. |
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Free
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Honor
Your Self with. . . Fun (an excerpt)
Iyanla Vanzant
We can get
so caught up in the processes of life, the responsibilities of
life, what we want from life, that we forget to have fun.
Life is a joke. It is absolutely hysterical. If you
think about some of the things that go on in life, you would have
no choice other than to laugh. Life is a game. Games
are intended to be fun, but we work at our games and turn our
games into work. We get so caught up in the work portion of
life that we forget to play. We forget to have fun.
This is where toys can become very helpful. When you commit
some time each week to playing and having fun, life gets much
easier. When you realize that there is more to life than
working and paying bills, when you have something fun to look
forward to, life takes on a completely different tone. Fun
gives you a new outlook. It helps you expand your mind and
your spirit. It keeps you young and vibrant. Fun
allows you to think about something other than what you don't have
or cannot do and the places you wish you didn't have to go.
Fun is
absolutely free. If you don't have toys, you can always get
naked. Just take your clothes off and stand in front of the
mirror. I guarantee that there will be at least one thing
about your body that you can laugh at. If laughing at
yourself is too traumatic, laugh at somebody else.
I sometimes
point and smile at people as I drive by. They are totally
shocked. Sometimes they smile back, but more often than not
they look around to see who I'm smiling at, knowing it can't be
them. We are so serious about life we don't think we should
smile at one another, particularly if we don't know one
another. I have fun pointing and smiling at people. I
have even more fun winking at men. They love it. If
you do it just the right way, their face will crack with a big
smile. Of course, it's safe because I can pull away when the
light turns green.
When was
the last time you played dress-up? Or threw a water balloon
at someone you know? When was the last time you had a talent
show with your children and friends? There are so many
simple things we can do to bring joy and laughter into our
lives. There are many noncompetitive, nonintellectual things
you can do just for the fun of doing them. You can miss the
news for one night. You can finish the book tomorrow.
The laundry can stay in a neat and orderly pile just a few more
hours. Right now, you need to go and have some fun. Go
on. Find something fun and do it.
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"If
you know who walks beside you, you can never be
afraid." This is the premise from which Iyanla Vanzant
has launched her enormously successful 40-day, spiritual
self-help program. One Day My Soul Just Opened Up is
designed as day-by-day journal/workbook to help readers
believe in a divine presence while pondering daily spiritual
lessons such as simplicity, peace, compassion, and
nonjudgement. |
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Are
you looking for inspirational and motivational reading material?
There are many great books out there that are made to lift you up
and inspire you, and when this ad from Amazon works right, it
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Living
Life Fully, the e-zine
exists to try to provide for visitors of the world wide web a
place
of growth, peace, inspiration, and encouragement. Our
articles
are presented as thoughts of the authors--by no means do
we
mean to present them as ways that anyone has to live
life. Take
from them what you will, and disagree with
whatever you disagree
with--just know that they'll be here for you
each week. |
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We
Need to Know We Matter
unattributed
We need to know that we matter in this life. We need
evidence that others are aware of our presence. And thus, we
can be certain that others need the same attention from us.
When we give it, we get it. So the giving of attention to
another searching soul meets our own need for attention as well.
Respectful
recognition of another's presence blesses him or her, ourselves,
and God. And we help one another grow, in important ways,
each time we pay the compliment of acknowledgement.
We're not
sure, on occasion, just what we have to offer our friends,
families, and co-workers. Why we are in certain
circumstances may have us baffled, but it's quite probably that
the people we associate with regularly need something we can give
them; the reverse is just as likely. So we can begin with
close attention to people in our path. It takes careful
listening and close observation to sense the message another soul
may be sending to our own.
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Always
remember, there is more strength in you than
you ever realized or even imagined. Certainly nothing
can keep you down if you are determined to get
on top of things and stay there.
Norman
Vincent Peale
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Creative
Many
Wilferd
A. Peterson
"The Creative Few" is the theme of Herbert Gasson's
book, Creative Thinkers, which was published in 1930.
He wrote: "In the evolution of the human race
upwards, all progress depends upon the production of a
comparatively small number of creative individuals."
That isn't
true today. There is a wave of extraordinary creativity
spreading all over the world and more people than ever before are
contributing to the progress of the human race. Individuals
have unprecedented opportunities to shine forth with innovation
and novelty. Everyone can be a creator and share in bringing
greater well-being to this planet and its people. For that
reason, I dedicate this essay to the "creative many."
Jane Addams
recoiled at the possibility of spending her life as a helpless
female with no purpose in life.
While
touring Europe in 1887, Addams visited Toynbee Hall, the original
settlement house in London's East End. Returning home, she
purchased the Hull mansion in the slums of Chicago where young
women of her station in life could help the poor.
At first,
Hull House was simply a first-aid station for the poor. As
Addams came to know the poor who were mostly immigrants, more
creative programs stressing educational and social services were
devised. Millions of Americans owe their success to the
influence of settlement houses patterned after Hull House.
Creativity,
which invites fresh, dynamic ways of looking at everything is the
source of change and newness for people everywhere. It is
free to all who will accept it. Creativity does not in any
way belong only to the few. It involves an acceptance
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of
the creative power of Spirit and is accessible and available to
everyone, though we have scarcely tapped its actual spiritual
potentials. True, we are all children of God, but "it
doth not yet appear what we shall be."
Creativity
is not limited to painters, sculptors, composers, poets, and
musicians. Wherever life is, creativity can be found.
Indeed, there is no spot on this earth where creativity is not
needed and where the potential for creativity is not present.
You are
creative. You can make a creative contribution to this time
in history by giving your support to the good and the true and the
beautiful. You can take a new look at your work and make
creative changes. You can look at human needs and help
supply creative answers.
The magic of
creativity touches all things. It works in millions of ways
to make a better world. And all these miracles come from God
through you, so every individual can make a creative
contribution. Together, through creativity, we can discover
new ideas, new approaches, new methods, new policies, and a new
life.
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Difficulty
creates the opportunity
for self-reflection and compassion.
If we embrace what's happening,
we are also embracing what is
possible--and a road opens up
for God to meet us halfway.
Suzan-Lori
Parks |
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Mission
statements represent your belief system—the priorities,
values and principles that measure your decisions. It
provides overall direction and clarifies your purpose and
meaning. When you clearly know what you want to be and to
do in your life, you feel strong in your sense of mission.
You’re no longer driven by everything that happens to
you. Rather, you feel a deep and complete commitment to
following your innermost values.
Dawn
Angier |
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