George Sand

Resolve to see the world on the sunny side, and you have almost won the battle of life at the outset.

Unattributed

Have faith in yourself and you will always be at your best; you will constantly express the best that exists in your conscious nature, and your work will be the result of your greatest capacity and highest efficiency.

Christian D. Larson

In the West, we are very goal oriented.  We know where we want to go, and we are very directed in getting there.  This may be useful, but often we forget to enjoy ourselves along the route.

There is a word in Buddhism that means "wishlessness" or "aimlessness."  The idea is that you do not put something in front of you and run after it, because everything is already here, in yourself.  While we practice walking meditation, we do not try to arrive anywhere.  We only make peaceful, happy steps.  If we keep thinking of the future, of what we want to realize, we will lose our steps.  The same is true with sitting meditation.  We sit just to enjoy our sitting; we do not sit in order to attain any goal.  This is quite important.  Each moment of sitting meditation brings us back to life, and we should sit in a way that we enjoy our sitting for the entire time we do it.  Whether we are eating a tangerine, drinking a cup of tea, or walking in meditation, we should do this in a way that is "aimless."

Often we tell ourselves, "Don't just sit there, do something!"  But when we practice awareness, we discover something unusual.  We discover that the opposite may be more helpful:  "Don't just do something, sit there!"  We must learn to stop from time to time in order to see clearly.  At first, "stopping" may look like a kind of resistance to modern life, but it is not.  It is not just a reaction; it is a way of life.  Humankind's survival depends on our ability to stop rushing.  "Stopping" is not only to stop the negative, but to allow positive healing to take place.  That is the purpose of our practice--not to avoid life, but to experience and demonstrate that happiness in life is possible now and also in the future.

The foundation of happiness in mindfulness.  The basic condition for being happy is our consciousness of being happy.  If we are not aware that we are happy, we are not really happy.  When we have a toothache, we know that not having a toothache is a wonderful thing.  But when we do not have a toothache, we are still not happy.  A non-toothache is very pleasant.  There are so many things that are enjoyable, but when we don't practice mindfulness, we don't appreciate them.  When we practice mindfulness, we come to cherish these things and we learn how to protect them.  By taking good care of the present moment, we take good care of the future.  Working for peace in the future is to work for peace in the present moment.

Back in the '80's I spent a year as a host parent for a foreign exchange student.  This young lady was a senior in high school and had come from a culture in which the customs were quite different from ours.  She was used to making a lot of decisions for herself, and one of the areas in which we locked horns had to do with her curfew time.  Obviously this was a power struggle.

A number of years ago, the concept of 'empowerment' was the latest buzzword in terms of management - much attention was given to it.  It was often not defined, and the use of the concept sometimes was to 'pass the buck' of responsibility on to employees when a supervisor was not sure of the right way to handle a situation.

Power is one of the five basic human needs.  By definition, power has to do with dominance and control.  I am not speaking of control of one human being over another or of hierarchical issues.  People take things personally, and the power that is a basic human need has to do with personal power.

If we translate the power need into a personal affirmation, we might say, "I am in control of my life."  Translate this further into the work environment, "I am in control of the work that I do."

When we are in control of our lives or our work, we then are able to make decisions that impact both and to take responsibility for our decisions. When people feel powerless it means that the ability to think creatively, to come up with options and to make decisions, to control our work or factors that affect our lives, have been taken away or are limited.  At that point most of us will resist, push, or stretch the boundaries in order to regain a sense of that personal power.

In order to make decisions we have to have all of the information possible available to us so that we know how to proceed.  Sometimes we feel that we do not have enough information or question our own ability to make a good decision.  When we feel that a situation is "out of control" it really means that we feel that we do not have the power to impact it positively.

My exchange daughter and I went back and forth about her curfew many times.  She always pushed the limits of my control, coming home right at the last second.  Finally one day I decided to "empower" her.  I told her that I was removing the curfew completely.  That I no longer was going to control her time but that I expected her to use good judgment.  I waited anxiously to see what would happen.

To my amazement, I suddenly saw her more than I ever had before. Instead of staying out until all hours, she would show up two hours earlier than the old curfew with her boyfriend and they would sit and watch television or talk.  She told me that they used to stay out as long as possible because they were acutely aware of the time restrictions.  After the restrictions were removed, she saw our house now as a welcome place to hang out rather than a prison from which she was 'on parole.'

Power is not something that we can bestow on another person.  It is something that they already have within them that they will struggle to retain.  Empowerment means that we acknowledge the personal power each person has to make positive decisions and to take responsibility for them, a simple exercise in treating others with dignity and respect.

Have a Great Day and be good to yourself. You deserve it!

Gail

Speaker, Author, Educator, Human Resources and Training Consultant, Gail Pursell Elliott is president and founder of Innovations "Training With A Can-Do Attitude"TM - Promoting Dignity and Respect, No Exceptions, in companies and communities nationwide.
To receive Food For Thought messages via email join the website mailing list at www.innovations-training.com  For permission to reprint in a newsletter or publication, contact Gail at info@innovations-training.com

The key to success is a combination of the 17 principles presented here and in the program the Science of Personal Achievement.

These 17 principles serve as a dependable road map leading directly to the source of all riches--be they intangible or material.  Follow this map and you cannot miss the way.  But be prepared to comply with all of the instructions and to assume all of the responsibilities that go with achieving success.

And, above all, remember that enduring success must be shared with others.

Napoleon Hill spent a lifetime researching the secrets of success.  Some of the most celebrated and successful people of the 20th century shared their insights with him during the course of his work, initially inspired by the industrialist Andrew Carnegie.

The 500 greats who collaborated with Napoleon Hill included Thomas Edison, Alexander Graham Bell, Henry Ford, Woodrow Wilson, Charles Schwab, J. Pierpont Morgan, and F.W. Woolworth.

While you might not found an international corporation or invent a life-altering device (but then again, you might!), if you use these inspired and inspiring keys to success, you will learn how to take full possession of your mind and your life, understand how adversity can be turned to your advantage and develop nurturing, harmonious relationships.

Countless millions worldwide have benefited from Napoleon Hill's work.  Now it is your turn.

1.  Definiteness of Purpose.

The starting point of all achievement, Definiteness of Purpose--knowing what your goal is, knowing what you want--fills you with a success-consciousness and protects you against failure.

Exercise:  Decide on a major goal in your live--either personal or professional.  How much time will you give yourself to achieve this goal?  How will you know that you achieved it?  Is your success measurable?  Attainable?  Write out your goal in a clear, concise, positive manner.  Transfer it to a 3 x 5 card; place it in your office and home where you will see your goal several times a day.

Successful people move on their own initiative, but they know where they are going before they start.

*  Adopt a definite purpose with an objective to be attained by the alliance

*  Determine what appropriate benefit each member may receive in return for his cooperation in the alliance, and see that he/she gets it

*  Establish a plan through which each member makes a definite contribution

*  Ensure that harmony prevails in the group

*  Remember that your watchword is definiteness of plan and purpose

*  Calculate the number of individuals in the group by the nature of the purpose to be attained

No person can become a permanent success without taking others along with him or her.

3.  Applied Faith.

A state of mind through which your aims, desires, plans and purposes are translated into their physical or financial equivalent.

Exercise:  What affirming statements, what beliefs do you feel you must have faith in before you can reach your goal?  These statements can refer to yourself, your fellow citizens, or the universe (and accompanying creator/s) at large.

You can do it if you believe you can.

4.  Pleasing Personality.

A pleasing personality helps you master the major cause of failure--the inability to get along with people harmoniously.

Exercise:  List the elements of a pleasing personality in which you most need to make improvement.  What steps will you take to make these changes?  How will changing them help you to reach your goal?

Your personality is your greatest asset or liability.  It embraces everything you control:  mind, body, and soul.

5.  Going the Extra Mile.

Rendering more and better service than you are paid to render, doing it all the time and doing it with a pleasing, positive attitude.

Exercise:  In the process of achieving your goal, and with the list of your "master minds" in mind, what "extra miles" might you consider going?  What might be the anticipated results of these extra efforts?

The most successful people are those who serve the greatest number of people.

6.  Personal Initiative.

The inner power that starts all action; the power that inspires the completion of all that one begins.

Exercise:  What actions can you take today, right now, to move toward your goals?  How about tomorrow?  What actions will be needed then?  Outline your planned movement toward your goal, beginning each step with the words, "I will. . ."  Be specific.

No people are free until they learn to do their own thinking and gain the courage to act on their own personal initiative.

7.  Self-Discipline.

The ability to control our thoughts and emotions, self-discipline is the only thing in life over which you have complete, unchallenged, and unchallengeable control.

Exercise:  Using the "I will. . ." statements outlined in #6, visualize in your mind that you are doing each one.  Imagine yourself going through whatever it takes to successfully complete each step.  How does it feel?  What do you notice as possible obstacles?  What parts were easy?  What ones were difficult?

Direct your thoughts, control your emotions and ordain your destiny.

8.  Controlled attention.

The highest form of self-discipline, the act of coordinating all your mind's faculties and directing their combined power to a given end.

Exercise:  What resources can you use for research as you plan your strategy for achieving your goals?  What affirmations would be most helpful if they were placed in your mind for your subconscious to remember?

You can keep your mind working for you, even while you sleep, with controlled attention.

9.  Enthusiasm.

A contagious state of mind that not only helps you gain the cooperation of others but, more importantly, inspires you to draw upon and use the power of your imagination.

Exercise:  It is always important to choose the most positive language-- with yourself and with others.  Demonstrate that by writing ten statements about potential obstacles that begin negatively, e.g., "I'm afraid that. . ." or "I doubt that. . ." or "I don't think that. . . ."  End each statement with a reason for your belief or doubt.  Now transform that into a positive statement by rewriting each statement, replacing "I'm afraid" or "I doubt" with "I can" or "I will."  Once again, give your reasons for holding these new enthusiastic and positive beliefs.  See the difference being positive in word choice can make?

Real enthusiasm comes from within, and is faith in action.

Next week:  The last eight principles.