H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

People are disturbed not by things that happen, but by their opinions of the things that happen.

Epictetus

You have to accept whatever comes, and the only important thing is that you meet it with the best you have to give.

Eleanor Roosevelt

Self-love in not only necessary and good, it is a prerequisite for loving others.

Rollo May

Reproduced with permission from the Ron White Ezine. To subscribe to Ron White's Ezine, go to http://www.memoryinamonth.com or send an email with Join in the subject to ronwhite@yoursuccessstore.com Copyright 2005 All rights reserved worldwide.

Here I Am

There's a thought that's been coming to my mind more and more in recent days, and it's a thought that I enjoy.  Quite simply, it's the thought "Here I am," and when it comes to me it brings along a lot of other thoughts and ideas.

First of all, it makes me realize that I am where I am, not somewhere else, so it's important for me to be present in the moment, in the place I am.  Each moment of our lives is full of possibility for making our lives and the lives of others somehow better, so since I'm right here right now, what kind of possibilities are within my reach?

Perhaps I'm at home with "nothing to do."  What kind of book can I pick up in order to learn something or entertain myself for a few minutes or a few hours?  Is there some sort of valuable program on TV from which I can learn about how other people deal with life and the problems they face?  Maybe it's time that I send an email to a good friend, or even a casual acquaintance who may one day be a good friend.

Or maybe I'm stuck in a traffic jam and I have no idea how long I'll be.  Here I am--there's nothing I can do to change the situation, so I might as well accept it and make the best of it.  Do I have a book or a magazine that I've been wanting to read?  Or do I have a CD or tape that I've been wanting to listen to?  Maybe it's time to breathe deeply and relax.  No matter what I decide to do, it's important that I switch from driving mode (since I'm not driving) into waiting mode, and do what I can to make the experience positive.

Sometimes I get "stuck" talking to someone I find unpleasant.  Then it's time for me to accept my situation and see the positive in it.  Perhaps if I listen closely to the person, I may learn something about why they're so unpleasant to me.  I might even learn something that will make me see them in a more sympathetic and a less judgmental way.

I often go to ceremonies that bore me, simply because I'm a person who doesn't put much stock in them.  Graduations, weddings, meetings, you name it--I don't mean to sound cold and callous, but I've never liked attending such ceremonies.  But when I do so for someone else's sake, the worst thing I can do is to act like I'm doing them a favor by being there, so I can find ways to make the time very interesting for myself.  After all, here I am.  I can watch people, I can try to get all that I can from any speeches that are given, or I can even mentally compose a letter to a friend.

My wife and I recently went to an appointment only to find that the person we were supposed to meet was going to be half an hour late.  I looked at her and said, "Well, here we are.  What can we do to make the most of the next half hour?"  So instead of sitting around wishing that our appointment had been on time, we did something that was fun and interesting for that time.  I'm not going to tell you what it was, because when you find yourself in that type of situation, you can use your imagination to come up with something interesting to do with the time.  And our "interesting" may not be the same as yours.

Being present in the moment is an important element of living our lives fully and getting the most out of each moment with which we're graced.  Our presence will help us to make our moments positive and enjoyable, and it will help us to learn and to grow as people.  And we each make our own moments--they don't just happen to us.  At any time, in any place, if I stop and tell myself "Here I am," I remind myself of the importance of making the most of that time and place if I want to take responsibility for making the moments of my life into positive experiences.

There is a cliché about "scraping the bottom of the barrel" which can be interpreted a number of ways depending on the circumstances.  This metaphor has been applied to commodities or resources, to ideas or options, even to people.

Some have used this metaphor in terms of employee recruitment saying, "We're really scraping the bottom of the barrel for staff."  Think about that statement.  Just who is at the "bottom of the barrel?"  Who wants to be referred to or thought of in that way?  I don't.  And I can't think of anyone else who does either.

Our attitudes determine how we interact with others as well as how we view the world around us.  If we voice the belief that we are "scraping the bottom of the barrel" for anything, what we are really saying is that we believe that our opportunities are limited, whether for success, substance, or relationships.  If we look for specific qualities in an employee, a company, a service provider, a product, a friend, or a companion, and find ourselves "scraping the bottom of the barrel," it means that we are ready to take what we can get rather than expecting to receive what we desire.  We are settling for less.

Once there was a supervisor who was quite disappointed in the follow through of a staff member.  This supervisor said to the employee, "You know, I ask very little of you."  The employee responded, "That's why you don't get much."

Whenever we say or think that we're "scraping the bottom of the barrel" we have set in motion an attitude of lack and limitation and have already lost our dreams.  It's no secret that we must ask for what we truly desire and then expect to receive it.  We have heard this stated in many ways by many different philosophies for centuries.  It is the truth.

The only thing that holds us back is our own sense of FUD:  fear, uncertainty, and doubt.  We are the only ones who can eliminate FUD from our lives.  No one can do it for us.  It is interesting that we are more willing to buy a lottery ticket than we are to eliminate FUD from our lives.  Those who buy lottery tickets know the odds of winning are huge and based purely upon chance yet will justify their investment by saying, "Someone has to win.  It only takes one number.  Why not mine?"

Attitude and expectation have to be renewed daily.  The first step is to believe that we deserve what we desire.  That sets the tone for the rest of our day and thought processes.  We may look into the barrel and at first glance it may seem pretty depleted.  Yet we never know what will be contained in that last scraping or whether what we thought was the bottom was simply the surface of another reservoir of opportunity.

Our perspective determines what we find.   Nothing else.

Have a Great Day and be good to yourself.  You deserve it!

Speaker, Author, Educator, Human Resources and Training Consultant, Gail Pursell Elliott is president and founder of Innovations "Training With A Can-Do Attitude"TM - Promoting Dignity and Respect, No Exceptions, in companies and communities nationwide.
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