People talk about the middle of the road as though it were unacceptable.  Actually, all human problems, excepting morals, come into the gray areas.  Things are not all black and white.  There have to be compromises.  The middle of the road is all of the usable surface.  The extremes, right and left, are in the gutters.

Dwight D. Eisenhower

If you are suffering from burnout, disappointment, or feeling stuck in a life that’s not working for you, take heart!  These seven stepping stones will guide you along an empowering path to renewed energy and zest for life.

1.  Shore up your energy for change.  When you are feeling defeated, resist the urge to push yourself into action to fix your life.  Instead, slow down and recharge your batteries.  Acknowledge that your resources have been drained by the stress of a life chronically out of whack.  Give yourself a nurturing gift by making a conscious choice to rejuvenate your body, mind and spirit.  Embarking on a big change when you are depleted of energy and enthusiasm may get you somewhere, but probably not where you really want to go.

2.  Resurrect the dreams you left behind.  Spend some quality time alone with your thoughts and a journal.  Write about your needs, your desires and your dreams.  Take a trip down memory lane and remember the things that used to bring a smile to your face, the things you enjoyed when you were younger and life was simpler.  What were your hopes for the future?  What is your highest aspiration for your life now? If there were no obstacles, what would you be doing with your life?

3.  Conquer your inner critic and limiting beliefs.  Beware of the ugly inner critic that wants to nip this “flight of fantasy’ thing in the bud.  Pay attention to the negative, critical messages that stop you from taking steps in a new direction.  Become an observer of your inner dialog and decide who you want in charge of your life: your inner critic or your inner coach?  Allow your inner coach to expand your belief in what is possible.

4.  Find joy in the journey.  Short-circuit the “I’ll be happy when…” syndrome by choosing to consciously dwell in positive thought and feeling.  Make a choice to spend more time noticing what is right with your life and what is right with you rather than feeding the cycle of negativity by magnifying what seems to be wrong or missing from your life.  Positive feelings such as gratitude, appreciation, love, and compassion for yourself and others will energize you and propel you toward a brighter future.

5.  Imagine you are already where you want to be.  Spend time playing in your imagination.  Not only is it okay to daydream, it’s a vital step in redesigning your life.  Allow yourself to vividly imagine the life that would bring you the greatest joy and satisfaction.  Then write about what you envision in clear, concise, emphatic, and energizing words.  An empowering vision for your future will lift you out of the doldrums and into action!

6.  Create an inspiring life plan.  Support your vision with a detailed plan for your new life.  What needs to change in order for you to experience a rich and robust quality of life?  Look at each aspect of your life that is important to you and make a conscious decision to fill in those missing pieces.  Declare your intentions in writing, and then make a commitment to take action to carry out your plan.

7.  Navigate the bumps in the road.  Allow for imperfections!  If things do not go as planned, or if something comes out of left field to knock you off track, let it be.  Tend to the crisis or detour, but hold onto your vision.  The path between where you are and where you want to be may not unfold in a straight line.  Look for the gift in the situation and get back on track as soon as you can.  Persistence and patience are important keys to transforming your life.

Celebrate every baby step along the way, because in time, each step will add up to a giant leap.  And before you know it, your dreams will have become your new reality!

Lauren E. Sullivan is the author of Give Wings to Your Dreams: Reawaken Your Joy and Passion for Life. An expert in women’s life change issues, she leads “Life Choice Retreats” in Santa Barbara, California, to help women in job burnout, midlife crisis, empty-nest syndrome, or divorce recovery to find a sense of life purpose, work/life balance and to improve quality of life.
Website: http://www.InspiredLifeDesign.com

Preparing Yourself

It's really quite interesting to see just how many people come to the Grand Canyon without having done any preparation at all.  They might have reserved a hotel room, or even made a reservation for dinner, but aside from that they have no idea what to do with their day at the Canyon.  They'll come up to someone who works at the Canyon and ask about the shuttles, about parking, about things to do to keep themselves busy.

One of the first questions that we ask is if they have a copy of The Guide, the newspaper that's given to them when they enter the park.  This paper has tons of information on ranger programs, hikes, shuttle routes and schedules, history, animal life, hours of shops and restaurants, and much more.  It's a short, easy read, too.  Almost invariably, they'll reply, "Yes, I have it, but it's in my car.  I haven't read it."

Now this isn't anything earth-shattering.  It's not a terrible thing that people do--it's just something they do.  But we see over and over again that people don't get all that much out of their vacations at the Canyon because they don't bother to take a short amount of time to prepare themselves by finding out what's available and then deciding what to do at the Canyon based on their own likes and needs.

When we came to the Canyon last year as part of our vacation, we looked things up online so that we would know what we wanted to do while we were here.  When we got The Guide and the map when we entered the park, we stopped for a few minutes to read it.  We learned where the shuttle stops were and how often they ran, and we looked carefully at the maps to see where we wanted to go--and even if it was possible to go there by foot in a certain amount of time.  We weren't experts on the Canyon by any means, but that small amount of preparation helped to make our two days very enjoyable.

Quite a few people actually die in the Canyon for lack of preparation.  There's a story posted around here about a woman who had recently run the Boston Marathon and who decided to hike to the bottom of the Canyon and out in one day.  To make a long story very short, she didn't take enough water with her and ended up dying.  "Drag-outs" are far too common all year long, and they're very expensive--they're what happens when people hike down into the Canyon and aren't able to make it back up because they aren't prepared for such a strenuous hike.

Adequate preparation can help us in almost everything we do.  If we're traveling, knowing something about the place we're coming to can help us to find things we need to find, and to enjoy our time there.  On the job, a small bit of research on a new task that we're supposed to do can make life much easier for us, and it can make us much more effective at the job we do.  Then we can provide much more value to the people we're working for and with.  In the family, knowing a little bit more about a situation before we react strongly can keep us from making big mistakes and damaging relationships.

We don't have to become experts at everything.  We don't even have to come close to expert level.  But we don't want to be one of those people who arrives at a place like the Grand Canyon--after having spent a lot of time and money getting here--only to stand there and say "What's there to do here?"  If we do that, we're definitely limiting our own ability to get the most out of this wonderful life that we have.  And we will be limiting ourselves--no one else will be contributing to our lack of a positive experience.

Following Your Dream
Chuck Gallozzi

Many live lives too small for their spirits

Stand-up comic Anita Wise had this to say, "I'm a little upset.  I just found out I have to have this little procedure done.  Nothing complicated, but they tell me it is going to improve my vision about 70 percent.  But I'm a little nervous.  I hate getting my bangs cut."

I'm glad to hear Anita Wise is improving her vision.  But how is your vision?  I'm not asking about the condition of you eyes, but the clarity of your focus.  I'm not asking whether you have 20/20 vision, but whether your mind's eye, your imagination, is clearly focused on a dream.

You see, many live lives too small for their spirits.  Our spirit and potential are infinite.  They know no bounds.  So, why is it so many of us choose to live mediocre lives?  Perhaps we haven't learned to see with our mind's eye, our imagination.  When we use our mind's eye, we open the door to infinite possibilities.  For imagination allows us to see beyond what is to what could be.  By focusing not on what we are, but what we can become, we discover the key to unlocking our potential.

Look within to gain insight.  For as Carl Jung wrote, "Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart.  Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakens."  Pick your dream carefully because we can become no larger than our vision.  The size of your dream limits the size of your accomplishments.  Although poor eyes limit what we can see, poor vision limits what we can do.

Instead of tuning into the TV, tune into yourself.  Tune into your dreams and aspirations.  To grow, plants stretch to reach the sun, and your hopes and dreams are the sun that nourish your growth.  Also, heed the words of Harriet Du Autermont:  "No vision and you perish / No Ideal, and you're lost / Your heart must ever cherish / Some faith at any cost. / Some hope, some dream to cling to / Some rainbow in the sky / Some melody to sing to / Some service that is high."

Our vision, then, is like a map that shows our destination.  Once we know we want to go, we can work backwards, figuring out what roads to take to get us safely to our destination.  After we know which way we wish to go, things start to happen.  Without a map, or vision, we cannot predict our future, but with a map, we become seers.  We can see into the future because we knowingly create it.  However, as the Japanese say, "Vision without action is a daydream and action with without vision is a nightmare."  After all, action without vision is action for action's sake.  It is misdirected, for it doesn't take us where we wish to go.

Once we envision the person we wish to become, how to we step into it, putting it on like a new set of garments?  The following six steps will get you where you wish to be.

1.  Take a look at where you are today and compare that to where you wish to be.  List the qualities you need to become the person you wish to be.

2.  List the steps you can take to develop those qualities in you.

3.  List the qualities you now have that are holding you back.

4.  List the steps you can take to develop qualities that are opposite to those that are holding you back.

5.  Take the actions you have outlined in steps #2 and 4.

6.  Check your progress daily and take corrective action when necessary to stay on course.

Let's look at an example.  Tom has been working for a year as a clerk in an office and dreams of moving up the ladder by becoming a supervisor, later a manager, and eventually a member of senior management.  Here are the steps he has taken to start on his journey.

1.  He examines his strengths and weakness and decides some of the qualities he needs include the ability to inspire others, better communication skills, and a better understanding of the overall goals of the company he works for.

2.  He lists steps he can take.  Realizing that he cannot inspire others until he is inspired, he decides to do his absolute best with every assignment the company gives him.  By doing so, he will become inspired by his own achievements.  Also, he decides to take a public speaking course to improve his communication skills.  Finally, he plans to carefully read the company newsletter and bulletins to fully understand company goals, and he will ask questions whenever he needs clarification.

3.  Tom believes his habits of wasting time and procrastination are holding him back.

4.  To quit wasting time he will read and apply what he learns from books on time management and organizational skills.  To end procrastination, he will develop the self-discipline to start working on each new task as soon as it arrives.

5.  He takes action, carefully taking the steps he outlined in #2 and 4.

6.  He monitors his activities daily to make sure he stays on course.

If we continually focus on our vision, it will enflame us with passion.  And that passion, or fiery enthusiasm, will propel us past self-doubt, fear, and complacency.  It will fill us with hope.  It will keep us inspired.  Peter Schultz, former CEO of Porsche, gives an example of the differences between ordinary workers and one that is inspired, "Three people were at work on a construction site.  All were doing the same job, but when each was asked what the job was, the answers varied.  'Breaking rocks,' the first replied.  'Earning my living,' the second said.  'Helping to build a cathedral,' said the third."  When we first set out on the road to our vision, we start out by doing whatever is possible.  Then, inspired by our own achievements, we move on to doing whatever is conceivable.  Finally, we muster up the courage to attack the inconceivable, using as our battle cry the Nike motto, "Impossible is nothing."  At this stage it is not surprising to have big dreams, for how can we succeed beyond our wildest dreams unless we first have a wild dream?

It's never too late to have a dream, embrace it, and bring it to life.  Many dreams have died by the wayside because of nagging self-doubt, because of the belief "it is not in me."  But if an inspiring vision ever flashed into your mind, it is only because it is in you striving to get out.  Don't kill the dream; kill the self-doubt.  The weapon of choice is action.  Follow the six steps already mentioned, and if you persist, it is impossible to fail.  For if you keep moving forward, no matter how small the steps, you will reach your destination.

Remember, a spirit without a vision is a life without a mission.  You owe it to yourself, the community, and the world to follow your dream.  As Woodrow Wilson said, "You are not here merely to make a living.  You are here in order to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, with a finer spirit of hope and achievement.  You are here to enrich the world, and you impoverish yourself if you forget the errand."

© Chuck Gallozzi, Chuck.Gallozzi#rogers.com  (Replace # with @)
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