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13 April 2010
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| It
is a psychological fact that people always conform to the
image they hold of themselves. Change their images and
you change their actions, their reactions, their
environment, their world.
Jack
Holland |
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Life,
like any other exciting story, is bound to have
painful and scary parts, boring and depressing parts,
but it's a brilliant story, and it's up to us how it will
turn out in the end.
Bo
Lozoff |
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Many of us say that we have faith, and that
we believe that our supply will manifest, yet at the same
time make arrangements in case it does not appear. We
say we are going to be victorious, yet we make preparations
for defeat. The life of faith cannot be lived in this
way.
Henry T. Hamblin |
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Nourishing
Awareness in Each Moment (an excerpt)
Thich Nhat Hanh
One
cold, winter evening I returned home from a walk in the
hills, and I found that all the doors and windows in my
hermitage had blown open. When I had left earlier, I
hadn't secured them, and a cold wind had blown through the
house, opened the windows, and scattered the papers from my
desk all over the room. Immediately, I closed the
doors and windows, lit a lamp, picked up the papers, and
arranged them neatly on my desk. Then I started a fire
in the fireplace, and soon the crackling logs brought warmth
back to the room.
Sometimes
in a crowd we feel tired, cold, and lonely. We may
wish to withdraw to be by ourselves and become warm again,
as I did when I closed the windows and sat by the fire,
protected from the damp, cold wind. Our senses are our
windows to the world, and sometimes the wind blows through
them and disturbs everything within us. Some of us
leave our windows open all the time, allowing the sights and
sounds of the world to invade us, penetrate us, and expose
our sad, troubled selves. We feel so cold, lonely, and
afraid. Do you ever find yourself watching an awful TV
program, unable to turn it off? The raucous noises,
explosions of gunfire, are upsetting. Yet you don't
get up and turn it off. Why do you torture yourself in
this way? Don't you want to close your windows?
Are you frightened of solitude--the emptiness and the
loneliness you may find when you face yourself alone?
Watching
a bad TV program, we become the TV program. We
are what we feel and perceive. If we are angry, we are
the anger. If we are in love, we are love. If we
look at a snow-covered mountain peak, we are the
mountain.
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We can be anything we want, so why do we
open our windows to bad TV programs made by sensationalist
producers in search of easy money, programs that make our
hearts pound, our fists tighten, and leave us
exhausted? Who allows such TV programs to be made and
seen by even the very young? We do! We are too
undemanding, too ready to watch whatever is on the screen,
too lonely, lazy, or bored to create our own lives. We
turn on the TV and leave it on, allowing someone else to
guide us, shape us, and destroy us. Losing ourselves
in this way is leaving our fate in the hands of others who
may not be acting responsibly. We must be aware of
which programs do harm to our nervous systems, minds, and
hearts, and which programs benefit us.
Of
course, I am not talking only about television. All
around us, how many lures are set by our fellows and
ourselves? In a single day, how many times do we
become lost and scattered because of them? We must be
very careful to protect our fate and our peace. I am
not suggesting that we just shut all our windows, for there
are many miracles in the world we call
"outside." We can open our windows to these
miracles and look at anyone of them with awareness.
This way, even while sitting beside a clear, flowing stream,
listening to beautiful music, or watching an excellent
movie, we need not lose ourselves entirely in the stream,
the music, or the film. We can continue to be aware of
ourselves and our breathing. With the sun of awareness
shining in us, we can avoid most dangers. The stream
will be purer, the music more harmonious, and the soul of
the filmmaker completely visible.
We
may want to leave the city and go off to the countryside to
help close those windows that trouble our spirit.
There we can become one with the quiet forest, and
rediscover and restore ourselves, without being swept away
by the chaos of the "outside world." The
fresh and silent woods help us remain in awareness, and when
our awareness is well-rooted and we can maintain it without
faltering, we may wish to return to the city and remain
there, less troubled. But sometimes we cannot leave
the city, and we have to find the refreshing and peaceful
elements that can heal us right in the midst of our busy
lives. We may wish to visit a good friend who can
comfort us, or go for a walk in a park and enjoy the trees
and the cool breeze. Whether we are in the city, the
countryside, or the wilderness, we need to sustain ourselves
by choosing our surroundings carefully and nourishing our
awareness in each moment.
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Thich
Nhat Hanh gives us a
work focused on awareness,
on seeing and feeling and
hearing all that goes on around
us in the world. By developing
awareness, we can increase
such parts of ourselves as gratitude and
appreciation, and
we can see more of the beauty
and wonder of the world--
beauty and wonder that
surround us all day, every day. |
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Living
Life Fully, the e-zine
exists to try to provide for visitors of the world wide web a
place
of growth, peace, inspiration, and encouragement. Our
articles
are presented as thoughts of the authors--by no means do
we
mean to present them as ways that anyone has to live
life. Take
from them what you will, and disagree with
whatever you disagree
with--just know that they'll be here for you
each week. |
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| The
desert dweller has lived in the desert so long that all of
its moods have long since become a part of the daily rhythm
of his life. But it is not that fact that is of
crucial importance. For many years, it has been his
custom to leave a lighted lantern by the roadside at night
to cheer the weary traveler. Beside the lantern there
is a note which gives detailed directions as to where his
cottage may be found so that if there is distress or need,
the stranger may find help. It is a very simple
gesture full of beauty and wholeness. To him, it is
not important how many people pass in the night and go on
their way. The important thing is that the lantern
burns every night and every night the note is there,
"just in case."
Years ago,
walking along a road outside Rangoon, I noted at intervals
along the way a roadside stone with a crock of water and,
occasionally, some fruit. Water and fruit were put
there by Buddhist priests to comfort and bless any
passerby--one's spiritual salutation to another. The
fact that I was a traveler from another part of the world,
speaking a strange language and practicing a different
faith, made no difference. What mattered was the fact
that I was walking along the road--what my mission was, who
I was--all irrelevant.
Howard
Thurman |
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The
Most Important Meetings You'll Ever Attend
Are the Meetings You Have With Yourself
Denis Waitley
You are your most important critic. There is no
opinion so vitally important to your well being as the
opinion you have of yourself. As you read this you're
talking to yourself right now. "Let's see if I
understand what he means by that. . . How does that compare
with my experiences? - I'll make note of that - try that
tomorrow - I already knew that... I already do
that." I believe this self-talk, this
psycholinguistics or language of the mind can be controlled
to work for us, especially in the building of
self-confidence and creativity. We're all talking to
ourselves every moment of our lives, except during certain
portions of our sleeping cycle. We're seldom even aware that
we're doing it. We all have a running commentary in
our heads on events and our reactions to them.
- Be aware of the silent conversation you have with
yourself. Are you a nurturing coach or a critic?
Do you reinforce your own success or negate it? Are
you comfortable saying to yourself, "That's more like
it". "Now we're in the groove."
"Things are working out well." "I am
reaching my financial goals." "I'll do it
better next time."
- When winners fail, they view it as a temporary
inconvenience, a learning experience, an isolated event and
a stepping-stone instead of a stumbling block.
- When winners succeed, they reinforce that success, by
feeling rewarded rather than guilty about the achievement
and the applause.
- When winners are paid a compliment, they simply
respond: "Thank you." They accept
value graciously when it is paid. They pay value in
their conversations with themselves and with other people.
A mark of an individual with healthy self-esteem is the
ability to spend time alone, without constantly needing
other people around. Being comfortable and enjoying
solitary time reveals inner peace and centering.
People who constantly need stimulation or conversation with
others are often a bit insecure and thus need to be propped
up by the company of others.
Always greet the people you meet with a smile. When
introducing yourself in any new association, take the
initiative to volunteer your own name first, clearly; and
always extend your hand first, looking the person in the
eyes when you speak.
In all your telephone communications, answer the telephone
pleasantly, immediately giving your own name to the caller,
before you ask who's calling. Whenever you initiate a
call, always give your own name up front, before you ask for
the party you want and before you state your business.
Leading with your own name underscores that a person of
value is making the call.
Don't brag. People who trumpet their exploits and
shout for service are actually calling for help. The
showoffs, braggarts and blowhards are desperate for
attention.
Don't tell your problems to people, unless they're directly
involved with the solutions. And don't make
excuses. Successful people seek those who look and
sound like success. Always talk affirmatively about
the progress you are trying to make.
As we said earlier, find successful role models after whom
you can pattern yourself. When you meet a mastermind,
become a master mime, and learn all you can about how he or
she succeeded. This is especially true with things you
fear. Find someone who has conquered what you fear and
learn from him or her.
When you make a mistake in life, or get ridiculed or
rejected, look at mistakes as detours on the road to
success, and view ridicule as ignorance. After a
rejection, take a look at your BAG. B is for
Blessings. Things you are endowed with that you often
take for granted like life itself, health, living in an
abundant country, family, friends, career. A is for
accomplishments. Think of the many things you are
proud of that you have done so far. And G is for
Goals. Think of your big dreams and plans for the
future that motivate you. If you took your BAG -
blessings, accomplishments and goals - to a party, and
spread them on the floor, in comparison to all your friends
and the people you admire, you'd take your own bag home,
realizing that you have as much going for yourself as anyone
else. Always view rejection as part of one
performance, not as a turndown of the performer.
And, enjoy those special meetings with yourself. Spend
this Saturday doing something you really want to do. I
don't mean next month or someday. This Saturday enjoy
being alive and being able to do it. You deserve
it. There will never be another you. This
Saturday will be spent. Why not spend at least one day
a week on You?!
Action Idea: Go for one entire day and night without
saying anything negative to yourself or to others.
Make a game of it. If a friend or colleague catches
you saying something negative, you must put a dollar in a
drawer or container toward a dinner or evening out with that
person. Do this for one month and see who has had to
pay the most money toward the evening.
Reprinted with permission
from Jim Rohn's Weekly E-zine.
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| Most
very successful people can remember that their success was
discovered and built out of adversity of some kind.
It's not the
problems that beset us--problems are surprisingly pretty
much
the same for millions of others--it's how we react to
problems
that determines not only our degree of growth and maturity
but our future success--and, perhaps, much of our health.
Earl
Nightingale |
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Eyes
Wide Open
tom walsh
What We
Don't See
My back
goes out every once in a while. A couple of times each
year, the muscles in my lower back decide to stop
cooperating with the rest of my body, and they think it's
great fun to send spasms of pain when I do something to
offend them, such as take a step or try to sit down or stand
up. I feel that I'm very fortunate that this happens
so infrequently, though it is a bit difficult to deal with
the pain when it does.
One of the
most interesting things about this back pain is that even
though I have a hard time sitting and standing and even
reaching sometimes, I still can go running while my back
hurts. I think it has to do with the steady motion of
running, but since I'm not a medical doctor, I can't be
sure. In any case, going for a run actually helps the
pain to lessen, and it seems to help it to go away sooner
than it does if I don't run.
That said,
the back pain came again last weekend. It was pretty
severe, as always, but not something that was going to keep
me inactive. On the morning of the second day of the
pain, I decided to go running. It's still pretty
painful to do so, but the pain is somewhat different--not as
sharp and not as debilitating.
So there I
was, running much slower than usual, feeling the pain in the
muscles of my lower back with every single step, when
suddenly I realized that none of the people who saw me
running had any idea that I was in pain. To them, I
was just another runner out for a run on a nice day.
That
realization got me to thinking about the people I see every
day. How many of them are going through extraordinary
amounts of pain every day, be it physical, mental, or
emotional, while I see them and have no idea what they're
going through? That man over there walking his dog
might have just lost his wife or a family member, and I have
no way of knowing. That woman in the store who was
pushing her cart so slowly might have been so slow because
she hurt herself or because she's suffering from some sort
of disease that is extremely painful, and she can't take
pain pills because they make her too groggy.
We could
theorize about everyone. We could make up stories
about who they are and what their lives are like, but the
truth is that we'll rarely know the truth. We go
through our days seeing many, many people, yet we know very,
very few of their stories.
Just as you
wouldn't have noticed that I had back pain unless I told
you, I will not notice that you're hurting emotionally
unless I find out from you or someone else. We don't
know what that man in the blue sweater is going through in
his mind--he seems happy, but I also seemed perfectly
healthy to others when I was running through the pain. I
believe that this is where compassion originates--the
recognition that the other people whom we see all day, every
day, are going through trials and struggles of their own
even though we have no idea what those struggles are.
We tend to feel that it's important to judge people, to
gauge their success or failure upon standards that others
have set and that we've adopted. But that student who
just failed her Biology test might have just gone through an
incredibly difficult emotional period, and the fact that
she's still alive and breathing and even taking the test in
the first place may be a great testimonial to her strength
and the success that her strength has brought her. So
whom do you see right now? Whom have you seen at other
times today? Do you know what hidden pains and trials
they may be bearing? Perhaps their actions look
immature or uncalled-for to you, but if you were able to see
them through the filter of their lives, how might they
look? Someone who saw me run while I was in pain would
have judged me to be a much slower runner than I usually am,
unless they had seen or known me in a different
context. I know that now, I'm going to try to ask
myself what pain someone might be carrying around with them
before I judge their words or actions. If I don't do
that, I will have learned nothing from my own experience. |
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Working for a veterinarian on a hectic Saturday
morning,
I picked up the ringing phone and was asked, "How much
does it cost to get a dog fixed?" Not knowing if the pet
was
male or female, I inquired, "Do you mean neutered or
spayed?"
To which she answered, "Whichever is
cheapest." |
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It's been said that to wonder is to begin to understand.
Wonder most definitely
creates possibilities! Where's your
sense of wonder? Have you gotten so
bogged down in the
minute-to minute "stuff" that life has become
dull? Bring
forth your curious, creative, sense of wonder
and dust if off -- lighten up and
wonder about everything!
We are all amazing and awesome beings and our world
is
extraordinary even when days may be dark. A sense of wonder
reminds
of just how vast the unknown is and how much we have to
learn each day.
Beth
Burns |
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If I were to wish for anything, I should not wish
for wealth and power,
but for the passionate sense of the potential,
for the eye which,
ever young and ardent, sees the possible. . .
what wine is so sparkling,
so fragrant, so intoxicating, as
possibility!
Søren Kierkegaard |
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The
Art of Getting Along
Wilferd A. Peterson
Sooner
or later people, if they are wise, discover that life is a
mixture of good days and bad, victory and defeat, give and
take.
They
learn that a person's size is often measured by the size of
the thing it takes to get his or her goat. . . . that the
conquest of petty irritations is vital to his or her
success.
They
learn that they who lose their temper usually lose.
They
learn that carrying a chip on their shoulder is the quickest
way to get into a fight.
They
learn that buck-passing acts as a boomerang.
They
learn that carrying tales and gossip about others is the
easiest way to become unpopular.
They
learn that everyone is human and that they can help to make
the day happier for others by smiling and saying "Good
morning!"
They
learn that giving others a mental lift by showing
appreciation and praise is the best way to lift their own
spirits.
They
learn that the world will not end when they fail or make an
error; that there is always another day and another chance.
They
learn that listening is frequently more important than
talking, and that they can often make a friend by letting
other people tell their troubles.
They
learn that all people have burnt toast for breakfast now and
then and that they shouldn't let their grumbling get them
down.
They
learn that people are not any more difficult to get along
with in one place than another and that "getting
along" depends about ninety-eight percent on their own
behavior.
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