Love. If we want to provide meaning in our lives,
then we must learn to love, and to love
unconditionally. Only when we learn how to do so can
we truly feel the sense of completion that is already
within ourselves, but that we keep repressed under the
layers of fear and control and feelings of
inadequacy. Here's one of the many secrets of
life: when we learn to love unconditionally, we no
longer need to fear, and we no longer need to protect
ourselves. When unconditional love becomes a true
way of life--all the time--then our lives will be so
filled with that one color that we'll find that other
colors no longer matter, and that therefore we'll have
access to all the colors that we want, all the time.
It is quite paradoxical, but it is true that we finally
learn to accept love from others when we've learned to
give love of ourselves. We learn to feel good about
ourselves when we spend more time making others feel good
about themselves. We feel the most peace when we do
our best to help others find peace, without controlling or
dominating them. And the key in all these situations
is to do what we do with love and caring.
I always used to feel sorry for myself because there
wasn't enough love in my life, because love had somehow
passed me by. What I thought was love, though, was
actually dependence. I felt that my life had no
meaning because I didn't have that "one love,"
the romantic love that we're taught is so important in our
lives. But that's not what brings meaning to
us. The love that brings meaning is the love that we
give and share, the love between friends and even enemies,
the giving of ourselves and our feelings with others who
need to feel love.
Most of the people who give their love unconditionally
don't even need to use the word "love."
It's clear in their actions, in their self-reliance, in
their gaze, in their way of being. And when we learn
to paint our lives with that color, what a beautiful
mixture of colors we'll receive in return as each person
shares their own colors of love with us.