Boundaries aren't all bad.  That's why
there are walls around mental institutions.

Peggy Noonan
Patriotic Grace

 

The purpose of having boundaries is to protect and take care of ourselves.  We need to be able to tell other people when they are acting in ways that are not acceptable to us. A first step is starting to know that we have a right to protect and defend ourselves. That we have not only the right, but the duty to take responsibility for how we allow others to treat us.

Robert Burney

     
The logical progression, then – what exactly are boundaries?  This shield can come in many different forms, but at its core, a boundary simply involves saying No.  No to giving something; no to behaving in a certain way; no to being treated in a way that will hurt your heart, your body, your totality.  Personal boundaries can come in all facets of life--physically, emotionally, and mentally.  You protect your body; you protect yourself from fatigue and stress, you protect your time, money, and even privacy.  You protect your right to a basic level of respect and courtesy.

Urban Monk
   

All her life, Claire had had a problem figuring out where other people ended and she began. All her life, she’d taken on the world’s hurt; she held herself responsible. But why?

Elin Hilderbrand
A Summer Affair

   
Individuals set boundaries to feel safe, respected, and heard.

Pamela Cummins

  

When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used
and mistreated. This is why we sometimes attack who they are, which is
far more hurtful than addressing a behavior or a choice.

Brené Brown
The Gifts of Imperfection

   

welcome page - contents - gallery - obstacles - quotations - the people behind the words
our current e-zine - articles and excerpts - Daily Meditations, Year Two - Year Three
     

Sign up for your free daily spiritual or general quotation
~ ~ Sign up for your free daily meditation

   

   

Setting boundaries is not a more sophisticated way of manipulation--
although some people will say they are setting boundaries, when in
fact
they are attempting to manipulate. The difference between
setting a boundary in a healthy way and manipulating is:  when
we set a boundary we let go of the outcome.

Robert Burney

   

In my personal relationships, I couldn’t find the edges where I
ended and others began. I sometimes felt powerless, unsure of
who I was in relationships, and unheard. I wasn’t sure how to
change my life, but I knew that I had to.  Because I didn’t set
healthy personal boundaries, I was exhausted, I couldn’t focus,
and I felt consumed by drama around me, in both my personal
and professional lives. As I result, I dealt with a lot of conflict,
failed to take care of myself, and generally disliked my work.

Britt Bolnick

    

Every healthy marriage is composed of walls and windows. The windows
are the aspects of your relationship that are open to the world—that is, the
necessary gaps through which you interact with family and friends; the walls
are the barriers of trust behind which you guard the most
intimate secrets of your marriage.

Elizabeth Gilbert
Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage

    

   
And after we have shown each other how we have set and kept the clear,
healthy boundaries that help us live side by side with each other, let us risk
remembering that we never stop silently loving those we once loved out loud.

Oriah Mountain Dreamer
   

The boundary to what we can accept is the boundary to our freedom.

Tara Brach
Radical Acceptance

    

People who violate your boundaries are thieves.
They steal time that doesn’t belong to them.

Elizabeth Grace Saunders
The 3 Secrets to Effective Time Investment

   

HOME - contents - Daily Meditations - abundance - acceptance - achievement - action - adversity - advertising - aging - ambition
anger - anticipation - anxiety - apathy - appreciation - arrogance - art - attitude - authenticity - awakening - awareness - awe
balance - beauty - being yourself - beliefs - body - brooding - busyness - caring - celebration - challenges -
change - character
charity - children - choices - Christianity - coincidence - commitment - common sense - community - comparison - compassion
competition - complaining - compliments - compromise - confidence - conformity - conscience - contentment - control - cooperation
courage - covetousness - creativity - crisis - criticism - cruelty -  death - decisions - desire - determination - disappointment
discipline - discouragement - diversity - doubt - dreams - earth - education - ego - emotions - encouragement - enlightenment
enthusiasm - envy - eternity - ethics - example - exercise - experience - failure - faith - fame - family - fate - fathers - fault-finding
fear - feelings - finances - flowers - forgiveness - freedom - friendship - frustration - fun - the future - garden of life - gardening
generosity - gentleness - giving - goals - God - goodness - grace - gratitude - greatness - greed - grief - growing up - guilt - habit
happiness - hatred - healing - health - heart - helpfulness - home - honesty - hope - hospitality - humility - hurry - ideals - identity
idleness  - idolatry - ignorance - illusion - imagination - impatience - individuality - the inner child - inspiration - integrity - intimacy
introspection - intuition - jealousy - journey of life - joy - judgment - karma - kindness - knowledge - language - laughter - laziness
leadership - learning - letting go - life - listening - loneliness - love - lying - magic - marriage - materialism - meanness - meditation
mindfulness - miracles - mistakes - mistrust - moderation - money - mothers - motivation - music - mystery - nature - negative attitude
now - oneness - open-mindedness - opportunity - optimism - pain - parenting - passion - the past - patience - peace - perfectionism
perseverance - perspective - pessimism - play - poetry - positive thoughts - possessions - potential - poverty - power - praise
prayer
- prejudice - pride - principle - problems - progress - prosperity - purpose - reading -recreation - reflection - relationships
religion - reputation - resentment - respect - responsibility - rest - revenge - risk - role models - running - ruts - sadness - safety
seasons of life - self - self-love - self-pity - self-reliance - self-respect selfishness - serving others - shame - silence - simplicity
slowing down - smiles -solitude - sorrow - spirit - stories - strength - stress - stupidity - success - suffering - talent
the tapestry of life - teachers - thoughts - time - today - tolerance - traditions - trees - trust - truth - unfulfilled dreams - values
vanity - virtue - vulnerability - walking - war - wealth - weight issues - wisdom - women - wonder - work - worry - worship
youth - spring - summer - fall - winter - Christmas - Thanksgiving - New Year - America - Zen sayings - articles & excerpts
Native American wisdom - The Law of Attraction - obstacles to living life fully - e-zine archives - quotations contents
our most recent e-zine - Great Thinkers - the people behind the words

  

We have some inspiring and motivational books that may interest you.  Our main way of supporting this site is through the sale of books, either physical copies or digital copies for your Amazon Kindle (including the online reader).  All of the money that we earn through them comes back to the site in one way or another.  Just click on the picture to the left to visit our page of books, both fiction and non-fiction!

  
Once you see the boundaries of your environment, they are no
longer the boundaries of your environment.

Marshall McLuhan
  

Appropriate boundaries create integrity.

Rae Shagalov

   
   
Indeed, the only truly serious questions are ones that even a child can
formulate.  Only the most naive of questions are truly serious.  They are
the questions with no answers.  A question with no answer is a barrier
that cannot be breached.  In other words, it is questions with no answers
that set the limit of human possibilities, describe
the boundaries of human existence.

Milan Kundera
The Unbearable Lightness of Being
 

Eros is an issue of boundaries.  He exists because certain boundaries do. In
the interval between reach and grasp, between glance and counterglance,
between ‘I love you’ and ‘I love you too,’ the absent presence of desire
comes alive.  But the boundaries of time and glance and I love you are only
aftershocks of the main, inevitable boundary that creates Eros: the boundary
of flesh and self between you and me.  And it is only, suddenly, at the moment
when I would dissolve that boundary, I realize I never can.

Anne Carson
Eros the Bittersweet

  
   
Setting boundaries is a way of caring for myself.  It doesn’t make me
mean, selfish, or uncaring because I don’t do things your way.
I care about me too.

Christine Morgan
  

The more severe the dysfunction you experienced growing up,
the more difficult boundaries are for you.

David W. Earle

  

You need boundaries. . . Even in our material creations, boundaries
mark the most beautiful of places, between the ocean and
the shore, between the mountains and the plains,
where the canyon meets the river.

William Paul Young

  

  

  

Just for Today, the Fire Edition--scores of photos and uplifting thoughts to help you to make your day a great one!
Now available in an expanded edition.