anger--an obstacle to living life fully. page 2.

Anger is the wind which blows
out the lamp of the mind.

Robert Ingersoll

Angry people are insecure people. Anger becomes a
face-saving device to cover up deficiencies of another sort.
Don't be fooled by the domineering character of an angry person.
Know that during moments of anger there dwells a poor self-image.

Shantidasa

Anger is the most futile emotion one can experience. It is totally negative
and feeds on one's irrational, vindictive, and punitive nature. It accomplishes
nothing but a wider rift between persons, a growing dissatisfaction with self,
and empty feeling where loving understanding ought to be.

Louise Doud

Frequent fits of anger produce in the soul a propensity to be angry,
which often ends in a bad temper, bitterness and morosity;
then the mind becomes ulcerated, peevish, and grumbling,
and is wounded by the least occurrence.

Plutarch

Often anger is a sign of engagement
with life. People who are angry are touched deeply by the events of their lives and feel strongly about them. As an emotion, it has
its limitations and it certainly has very bad press, but my experience with ill people
suggests there is something healthy about it. Certainly the cancer studies by Levy, Temoshak, and Greer suggest that many people who recover become angry first. Anger is just a demand for change, a passionate wish for things to be different. . . . Anger
becomes a problem for people only when they become wedded to it as a way of life.

Rachel Naomi Remen

Anger is an alarm system, signaling the presence of nothing
more than fear. It tells us we are working at cross-purposes
to our own happiness, fearing the loss of something
more than we enjoy the experience of having it.

Jesse Jennings

The angry person is never in the right even when right.

Shantidasa

Anger repressed can poison a relationship
as surely as the cruelest words.

Joyce Brothers

There is no enemy more vicious than your own anger.

Sathya Sai Baba

Anger is a form of fear and evidence
of the need of defense.

Fred Van Amburgh

Every angry thought makes it a little easier to get angry the next time, and a little more likely.

Eknath Easwaran

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Bobby and I were married in 1954 and by now we know that
anger does not mean "I don't love you" or "I want a divorce."
It means, "I am wounded and in need of love, and I feel safe
telling you about it because you are my family." Sometimes
our behavior with each other is no different
from the cry of an unattended baby.

Bernie Siegel

Beware of anger. It is the most difficult to remove
of all the hindrances. But it is the alcohol of the body,
you know, and the devil of it is that it deadens the perceptions.

Margery Allingham

Anybody can become angry--that is easy; but to be angry with
the right person, and to the right degree, and at
the right time, and for the right purpose, and in the right way--
that is not within everybody's power and is not easy.

Aristotle

Therapists want to help us throw out what is unwanted and keep only
what is wanted. But what is left may not be very much. If we try
to throw away what we don’t want, we may throw away most of ourselves.
Instead of acting as if we can dispose of parts of ourselves, we should learn
the art of transformation. We can transform our anger, for example,
into something more wholesome, like understanding. We do not need surgery
to remove our anger. If we become angry at our anger, we will have two angers
at the same time. We only have to observe it with love and attention. If we take care
of our anger this way, without trying to run away from it, it will transform itself.
This is peacemaking. If we are peaceful in ourselves, we can make peace
with our anger. We can deal with depression, anxiety, fear,
or any unpleasant feeling in the same way.

Thich Nhat Hanh

Articles and book excerpts on Anger:

The Fence      Author Unknown
The (Ig)Noble Flames of Anger      Lucy Lopez
When You See "Red"      Rhoberta Shaler

Anger is a powerful emotional energy that constantly seeks an outlet. The tension
that surrounds anger is sometimes so volatile and unendurable that catharsis appears
to be the only relief. Accusations and abuse directed at another become a means
of relieving ourselves of the pain of our own anger. We insist on being heard, on
making our point, yet in doing so we create an even deeper pain--the pain of
separation and division. . . . It takes remarkable patience and compassion to pause
before words of anger are hurled at another. At times this pause is born of the
wisdom that recognizes that the only point we make in the impulsive expression
of anger is that we may be a person to fear and avoid.

Christina Feldman

There is nothing wrong with anger. Anger is a beautiful emotion,
as valid and rich as joy or laughter. But you have been taught to
repress your anger. Your anger has been condemned. If anger
is unexpressed, it will slowly poison you. The key is to know how
to express your anger. Do not throw it out onto any one. No one
is responsible for your anger. Simply express your anger. Beat
up a cushion. Go for a run. Express your anger to a tree.
Dance your anger. Enjoy it.

Leonard Jacobson

Anger is a response that can lead to harm if we don't evaluate
what we are upset about. Ask yourself what you are afraid of,
as anger is almost always fear in disguise. If we think something
or someone threatens us, we feel fear--fear that we are inadequate,
that our lives are out of control, that things won't go our way.
Then we fight. Find out what you're upset about. We rarely are
upset for the reason we think.

Jennifer James

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